Love it or hate it, Valentine's Day is almost here. I may not get flowers or chocolates from a lover, but who cares? What I am going to get is off my ass! There are some fantastic events going on this month in the Q.C. I'm going to be a V-day slut and try them all - from jazz songs to men in thongs. I heart February!
LoveMake at Dupp & Swat: What's the recipe for making love? LoveMake has the right idea: cocktails, massages and desserts. Single or coupled up, this event is about indulging your senses. Come make massage bars with me! I don't know what they are but they sound scandalous. $25. Feb. 6, 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. 2424 N. Davidson St., Suite 112B.
Jazz for Lovers at Bechtler Museum of Modern Art: Swoon and sway as Toni Tupponce, aka "the sexiest voice in Charlotte," sings with the Ziad Jazz Quartet. It will be the price of admission just to hear her sing "Lover Man (Oh,Where Can You Be?)." $12 (free for museum members). Feb. 7, 8:15 p.m. 420 S. Tryon St..
Purgatory 56: St. Valentine's Day Massacre at Amos' Southend: Need a place to unleash? (Or to be leashed, if you're into that.) Indulge your voyeuristic or exhibitionist tendencies at Purgatory. VIP passes get you special access to fetish demonstrations. $12-$15. Feb. 8, 8 p.m. to 2 a.m. 1423 S. Tryon St.
Buns N Bowties at Uptown Cabaret: What is it about male strippers that is so ridiculous? I just can't take them seriously. But if they don't dance to "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" wearing nothing but chaps, I will be sorely disappointed. For reservations, call 704-493-5653. Feb. 9, 7 p.m. to 11 p.m. 108 E. Morehead St.
Mingling for a Cure at Dandelion Market: Carolinas Matchmaker and Guys and Dolls of the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation are hosting a mixer for professional singles in their 20's and 30's. Laurie Berzack, matchmaker extraordinaire, will be on hand to guide you. $15-$20. Feb. 12, 6:30 p.m. 118 W. 5th St.
Love Sux at Howl at the Moon: Don't drown your dateless sorrows in a pint of Ben & Jerry's! Join other solo celebrants at this free singles-only happy hour. When you arrive, use the super secret code "Outside the Box Dating Singles" to join the party. Free. Feb. 14, 5 p.m. to 9 p.m. 210 E. Trade St., Suite 308.
For the Love of Beer at Triple C Brewing Co.: Got a man who makes your heart go pitter-patter? Treat him to a five course dinner prepared by the guys that bring you Hot Box Food Truck and handcrafted beer from Triple C. Lucky couples also take home a special lover's gift bag. $90/couple. Feb. 14, 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. 2900 Griffith St.
Valentine's Orchid Sale at UNC Charlotte Botanical Gardens: Legend has it that orchids were used by witches in their potions: fresh flowers to elicit love and dried ones to provoke passion. Place one of these exotic and, dare I say, erotic plants in a sunny spot and see what happens. You may find the elixir of love! Feb. 15, 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. 9201 University City Blvd.
Second Chance Valentine's Soiree at Frock Shop: Don your vintage cocktail attire and support the arts. This swanky-on-a-budget event funds micro-grants for creatives in our community. Hosted by the Frock Shop and Bistro La Bon, you're guaranteed a good time. $25; two for $40. Feb. 23, 6 p.m. 901 Central Ave.
Black Coffee at Studio Movie Grill: Make a red carpet entrance at the Charlotte Black Film Festival and see the Charlotte premiere of the romantic-comedy, Black Coffee. I'm not sure who is going to be at the meet & greet, but just in case Darrin Dewitt Henson makes an appearance, I've already bought my tickets. $12; two for $20. Feb 27, 6 p.m. to 9:45 p.m. 210 E. Trade St., D290.