Basic necessities: Someone gained about 20 pounds after visiting a local Old Navy. A woman walked out of the store with what had to have been multiple pairs of khakis (unless Old Navy got high end and no one told us) worth a grand total of $209.58.
Not-so-sweet surprise: One store clerk literally got the shock of her life when a seemingly friendly customer returned after his first trip, in which he purchased some candy, used a Taser on her twice, and stole $100.
Forked: A man suffered minor injuries after he was struck by a forklift.
Officer Bard: CMPD might be employing Shakespeare incarnate — or a cop who really wants to show off his SAT vocabulary. The report details a seemingly benign confrontation between two individuals that the officer called a "mutual affray." That, we now know thanks to Google, is a public fight.
Y'all come back now: A recent visitor experienced the ugly side of Southern hospitality when his laptop, laptop bag, passport, watch, some cash and return airline ticket to Lebanon were stolen from an apartment.
Naughty boy: A woman walked into a business in northwest Charlotte when a man approached her and tried to start up a conversation. Talking was getting him nowhere, so he decided to run his fingers through her hair — and pull some. While some people would welcome this with open arms, we're assuming the victim was neither dressed in all leather nor wielding a whip.
Joe Blow: Speaking of overly aggressive pickup tactics, a woman called police after someone had left hand-written notes around her house informing her that if "she wanted to have a good time to call Joe."
Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department. All suspects are innocent until proven guilty.