FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH
Pardon me, Broseph, but can you point me in the direction of the nearest testosterone-fueled heavy metal band that’s pop enough to make the radio, but aggressive enough to make me feel threatened? Five Finger Death Punch fits the formula perfectly — they can show off a soft side before heavy chugging guitars and thundering drums drive into your skull with authority. It’s by-the-book stuff, but damn if they don’t pull it off really well. Some of the emo-induced lyrics are laughable — “did you hear the one about me being a punk/did you hear the one about me being a drunk” — but live, the band is a juggernaut. Rarely do you see a quintet with equally kinetic stage presence that pulls your eyes in five different directions at once. The band’s biggest fans probably have fake testicles hanging on the back of their pickup trucks, but if you’re going to listen to soul-less aggro-rock, why not make it one of the few who do it really well.