Dear Karma Cleanser:
I am in a relationship with a woman that seems like we're separated despite living together because of kids and what once was love. In the past few months I met a wonderful and understanding lady online and really enjoyed being with her. The relationship with this new lady failed on my part, from being stupid and failing to see where real happiness was. It's not with the one I am with, but the one that I met.
I went back to my first relationship and it's void and unfulfilled. I have emptiness in my heart for the one I met and lost because of lack of honesty on my part. I am torn between two people I love. One I live with and love, and the other I truly love and can't have.
My dilemma is one of modern times. I am at fault and feel I lost a terrific friend as a result. The lady I met is bitter and I feel I have betrayed her as well as myself. Should I forget the new-found love, move on and remain empty?
---- Lost PirateConventional wisdom says it's deadly to stay in a toxic relationship just because of the kids: The byproducts of dysfunction will seep into the soil and poison the household. That same wisdom tells us that online flings never work -- you can't know a person by a few Web pics alone. We say reject the current thinking and start filling that emptiness. A real pirate is never lost: There's new booty in every port (or something like that.)
Dear Karma Cleanser:
On April 23, while walking into a gas station, I noticed a beautiful girl in a yellow Volkswagen Beetle waving at me. She even beckoned me to her car, but for some reason I went into the store first, meaning to speak with her when I left.
An irate customer kept me in the store longer than I should have been. Distracted, I forgot all about the girl outside. When I finally left, I went straight to my car and drove past her. I said, "Nice ride," and kept going. Of course I realized my mistake and went back but she was gone, and I've been looking for her ever since.
She was the girl of my dreams (physically), and I can't believe I let her get away. I've placed ads online in missed connections with no luck. Nothing has gone right for me since that day. I walk around in a complete state of misery. The one day in my life when I wasn't thinking with my penis and look what happens to me.
Am I suffering some type of karmic retribution? I've always tried to be a righteous cat and can't believe this has happened to me. I've blown my chance at love and my summer too and can't seem to shake it. Your advice, please.
---- Lost ChancesLet it go. Beautiful girls in yellow Beetles are like unicorns and leprechauns -- the stuff of fantasy. It can drive you mad, if you let it. Stop longing for what's lost. Instead, use this lesson to recognize any opportunity that crosses your path. Once you know that, there will be yellow Beetles at every intersection.
Been bad? karmacleanser@gmail.com.
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