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As a young boy I was attracted to older men. Even before I had any inkling of sexuality. I never dated girls but like most boys looked at porn magazines and masturbated. Being attracted to men who were old enough to be my father or grandfather seemed to be very natural to me. Later in my 20's my infatuation for older men slowly morphed into a sexual attraction. I must add that I grew up without a father,my father deserted our family when I was five. I never had the love and affection of a father and always felt other boys were so lucky to have a daddy. I yearned for that love. I masturbated with fantasies of being with older men. At age 31 and with peer pressure from friends and family I finally decided to get married a woman. My wife was the one who proposed to me! I enjoyed sex with her initially but it got old,I loved her but I was not in love with her.
I was just lying to myself. I grew lonely. When computers came about I found chat rooms on AOL where I chatted with older men and also younger men like myself who were attracted to older men. I learned that there were others just like me who had a deep sincere attraction to older men but who were not attracted to men their age or younger men, exclusively seniors men. Inhsd never been to a guy bar,I had never been with a man sexually ever in my life at this point. I met a wonderful older man from New Orleans, he was age 70 and I was age 41. He was also married,fir 31 years. I had been married 10 years, neither of us had children with our wives. We decided to meet in person. We fell in love and both divorced our wives. We shared 4 wonderful years in love. He died of lung cancer in 2000. His death devastated my heart. We were so deeply in love.
A year later I met my second partner,he was age 69. Our relationship grew slower but after 16 years together we were deeply in love,very happy and content. At age 84 he passed away last May.
We kept our relationship private. He was old fashioned and didn't want to be "out". I understood that. Both of my partners were wonderful mentors, both men highly educated. My second partner was a college professor. Both very worldly men. I learned so much from both of them about being a wholesome man. I feel very lucky to have been deeply in love with two wonderful men. They both healed my heart and erased all the yearning I had as a boy yearning for a father to guide and love me. Both loves were like a story book love. Theses men taught me by example how to cope with being different in today's society. Being gay does not define anyone,it is just a part of the whole person we are. We are human first. I have learned that the majority of homosexual men are high achievers and far more intelligent over a broader spectrum of life's subjects,more compassionate and understanding. I am deeply proud to be gay,but I don't feel the need to shout from the top of a mountain,it is a part of my whole self. I realize that people have different perspectives of homosexuality and have opinions about December-May (inter generational gay relationships). Being happy,in love and feeling content is what we all yearn for in life. If two people fall in love they are in love. Live and let live. Be happy!
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I didn't cheat and I was cheated on. I didn't lie and I was lied to. I didn't hate and no one loved me. Your article is silly.
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At 20 I met a man who had just turned 37 and we fell for each other literally overnight. Not because we had sex, but because we spent all night talking. I was a good student in school who preferred hanging with the teachers asking questions after class to goofing off with my classmates. We were together for 9 years and then I lost him to AIDS-related encephalopathy. During those 9 years he helped me get an education and we bettered our careers enough to buy a house together. I miss him still.
Not every May-December relationship is as healthy as ours was, I admit. But don't assume they are all unhealthy, either. Find out what brought them together, what keeps them together, and what benefits each one brings to the relationship before judging them. As long as the younger man isn't being damaged in some way, I don't see what the fuss is about.
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I ask myself two questions:
1. Am I present here and now, with this person on this date?
2. Is my date present here and now, with me?
Or is one or both of us recalling the past, or imagining the future - flinging out past stories, or future wishes at the other person?
We all have stories about the past, and we all imagine a desired future. These are worth sharing and discovering. But a conversation continually "stuck" in the past or the future is a red flag.
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