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Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Nine better reasons why Charlotte is weird

Posted By on Wed, Mar 19, 2014 at 5:00 PM

The Huffington Post published a story today offering 15 reasons why Charlotte is weird.

No, HuffPo, your list is weird. I can appreciate snark and tongue-in-cheek and all that, but if that was indeed the intention, you missed the mark.

I'll give you your props, HuffPo, in that a few items rang true. Yes, it's a little odd that our downtown area is called Uptown (but after a year or two living here, you get over that). And those murals at Bank of America Corporate Center are definitely strange.

But the rest of your list is crap. It's not informed. It's not funny. It's not even relatable, like that Onion article was. The fact that you had to resort to using a JLaw GIF clearly shows this list was half-assed.

In no particular order, and in no way complete, here's a real list of why Charlotte is weird.

1) We're the home of the incredibly confusing intersection of Providence/Providence/Queens/Queens.

2) Thongs are oddly popular here: Earth Angel, a shop that offers thongs, bikinis, corsets, lingerie and more has managed to remain open - and lets you know with a sign that screams the words "Yes We're Still Open" - in an almost deserted strip mall along the construction-torn Independence Boulevard.

3) We like companies that fund terrorists so much so that our officials lobby for them to relocate their headquarters.

4) We're weirdly fascinated with shady evangelists. First Jim Bakker, now Elevation's Steve Furtick.

5) We're a city of sometimes fantastic, mostly random smells.

6) We're the Pimento Cheese capital of the world. Nuff said.

7) Some of our innovative restaurateurs thought to pair sushi and burgers together to create burgushi. I don't know what's weirder than the word burgushi.

8) We're the largest metropolitan city without a zoo.

9) We have people like Jim McGuire, who thought it cool to place a 6-foot head in his front yard. (He no longer lives at the house on The Plaza, but the head remains.)

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