January 11, 2006 Edibles » Table Dancing

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Auld Lang Van 

Or, another year-end Top 40

By

I, the undersigned, do hereby make the following culinary proclamations and resolutions as concerns for the New Year (2006, for those still in extended hangover mode):

1. Quickly check online for any mixed drinks that I might be able to make out of all the leftover cheap champagne I've amassed.

2. Learn to use the combination rice cooker/steamer received for Christmas. (You want authentic? Check it: "features Cool Touch Body, avoid to be scalded." That shit's straight off the boat!)

3. Bring back my girlfriend's Tupperware from the office.

4. Continue to preach the gospel of Cuisine Malaya, one the most underrated (and yet affordable) Japanese/Malay/sushi houses in town.

5. Along those lines, visit the delicious local treasure Lang Van -- a cinch for those seeking affordable Vietnamese cuisine -- at least monthly.

6. Read my (thoughtfully given) new subscription to Chow magazine, the food magazine for the rest of us. What other food magazine has the sack to use the word "shitty" (in a pull-quote, no less), yet also provides tasty recipes from some of the nation's best chefs? What other rag contains Chow's combination of kitchen science, recipes, and food sociology? None that I'm aware of. (And no, they didn't pay me to write this.)

7. Visit more ethnic markets for quality, authentic foodstuffs. South Boulevard and Central Avenue are filled with them (Mexican, Chinese, Vietnamese, you name it), and the prices are loads better than you'll get at your local Teeter. Sure, the language barrier's a bit daunting, but that's part of the fun, is it not?

8. Find out where you can buy good old-fashioned lard.

9. Grow some heirloom tomatoes.

10. Consume the hell out of them, preferably as part of some fresh bruschetta.

11. Hunt down the city's best cannolis.

12. Consume the hell out of them, too.

13. Spend more time on eGullet, the best online foodie forum, bar none.

14. Eat little to no fast food, excepting maybe Quiznos or Chick-fil-A, in a pinch.

15. Remember that High Gravity Beer = Loss of Gravity's Effects after about 24 ounces.

16. Try some of the new premium mescals, preferably sipped from a snifter.

17. Get off my ass and find out which restaurants now carry them.

18. Dine at Zebra, a restaurant which, inexplicably, I've yet to have the good fortune to attend.

19. Figure out why -- also rather inexplicably -- people seem to love the Cheesecake Factory so. Stop calling it Chili's on steroids.

20. Archive as many of my family's recipes as I can get my grubby little hands on.

21. Do something about those perpetually grubby little hands.

22. Find a top-notch fishmonger and butcher.

23. Say "fishmonger" more, as it sounds pretty cool.

24. Become a fishmonger.

25. Snap out of it.

26. Buy a quality, cast-iron grillpan/skillet.

28. Continue to learn and convey to others the cultural and sociological stories behind the food we consume.

29. Never, ever be what food writer John T. Edge terms a "culinary pelt hunter."

30. Stop using the word "culinary" so much.

31. Take more "dining day trips." The first such trip on the docket? Raleigh's Fearrington House.

32. Eat in Charleston -- at least quarterly, as finances dictate.

33. Find out if Green's Lunch puts nicotine in their addictive "southern style" hot dogs.

34. Eat fewer Green's Lunch hot dogs. (Last year's estimate? A good 45 to 50.)

36. Invite restaurants, chefs, distributors and other such food-inclined folks to e-mail me tips, ideas, dinner suggestions and similar to timothycdavis1@gmail.com.

37. Turn the world on to one of the true North Carolina treasures not named barbecue and livermush: Moravian wafer cookies and sweets.

38. Wean my parents off of Food TV's Emeril Lagasse.

39. Watch more Paula Deen. As a teacher of mine recently noted, "you can tell she's worked out her meals in the kitchen, unlike that skinny little Everyday Italian b___."

40. Share as many meals as possible with family and friends, whether at home or in a restaurant. Share stories. Chew the proverbial fat. And even pick up the tab on occasion.

Sincerely,

TCD

Timothy C. Davis is a correspondent for Gravy, the official newsletter of the Southern Foodways Alliance. His food writing has appeared in Gastronomica, Saveur, The Christian Science Monitor and the food website egullet.com, among other publications.

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