They Left The Kitchen Sink: A 53-year-old north Charlotte man phoned police to report a theft. Sometime between April 24 and May 19 — was he out of town? not paying attention? — someone stole a Torrent fishing rod, a flower vase, a weed whacker, a fireplace guard, a ladder and a tan and red Golden Electric Mobile Chair valued at more than $4,500.
Better Than A Banana?: A Lexus GS300 belonging to a 33-year-old Uptown resident was damaged after someone pushed a broom handle into the muffler. No word if a quidditch match was taking place nearby.
Those aren't the rims you're looking for: A 59-year-old east Charlotte woman reported that the plastic wheel covers for her 2010 Nissan Versa were stolen.
Smokey Joe: Someone shoplifted $2,600 worth of Newport cigarettes from a University-area 7 Eleven. The suspect took 50 cartons before exiting the business and driving away. Seems like someone trying to carry 50 cartons of cigarettes out of a store might be pretty easy to stop before they get too far, but that's just me.
Someone hates the outdoors: An east Charlotte man phoned police after noticing that someone had entered his yard and scratched the front of his Perception kayak. He also noted that someone had cut a tarp that was used to cover the kayak and that several items in his yard had been moved around. Also, his tent was placed near the front gate.
Maybe He Wanted Him To Catch It: An 18-year-old man phoned police after getting in an argument with an unknown suspect who then threw candy at the victim's face. That's not the kind of behavior Willy Wonka approves of.
Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department. All suspects are innocent until proven guilty.