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STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS Pop quiz, hotshot. Which line of dialogue does not appear in a Star Wars movie? A) "May the Force be with you." B) "Join me, and together we can rule the galaxy as father and son." C) "So this is how liberty dies, with thunderous applause." D) "Does sweet'um want some num-nums?" I wish I could say that the correct answer is D), but all four lines appear in one installment or another, with that atrocious final snippet appearing in this animated eyesore. The early word was that only Star Wars fanatics would enjoy this addition to the franchise, but that's grossly inaccurate: As someone who was 11 years old when the original film hit theaters back in 1977 and thus has always considered it a rite-of-passage milestone, I was nauseated upon stumbling out of George Lucas' latest sorry attempt to squeeze every last penny out of this franchise. Set in the period between Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith, this focuses on the war that helped the evil Empire take over the galaxy. The plot concerns the efforts of Anakin Skywalker and his sassy apprentice, a teen named Ahsoka Tano (Lucasfilm, meet the Disney Channel), to rescue Jabba the Hutt's kidnapped baby boy (nicknamed "Stinky") from Count Dooku and his posse. What sort of nonsense is this? The CGI animation, which director Dave Filoni states was inspired by both Japanese anime and Thunderbirds' puppets, is harsh on the eyes and proves to be aesthetically unpleasing. A couple of action sequences manage to elevate this out of the realm of utter despair, but for the most part, this is curdled cinema that even the fans will upchuck. *1/2
STEP BROTHERS The battle for the title of Hollywood's Ultimate Man-Child finds Will Ferrell finally overtaking Adam Sandler. While Sandler plays an actual adult (well, sort of) in the recent You Don't Mess With the Zohan, Ferrell again adopts an infantile pose, this time in the service of Step Brothers. The law of diminishing returns – to say nothing of Step Brothers' cringe-inducing trailer – suggests that this should represent the nadir of Ferrell's efforts, but the truth is that he's done worse: This is rescued from the bottom of the sewer by several choice quips as well as a surprising sweetness at the center of its storyline involving family dysfunction. Ferrell and Talladega Nights partner John C. Reilly star as Brennan and Dale, two 40-ish men still living at home with their single parents (Mary Steenburgen and Richard Jenkins, respectively). When said parents decide to marry each other, the two "kids" are forced to not only live under the same roof but also share a bedroom. Initially combative, they become best friends after they're united by their mutual hatred of Brennan's smug, perfectionist brother Derek (Adam Scott). As usual, Ferrell doesn't know where to draw the line when it comes to childish antics on screen. But the theme of how parents and children will often fail each other carries some startling resonance (thanks largely to Steenburgen's delicate performance), and every time we write off the dialogue as just a string of schoolyard taunts, along comes an unexpected zinger. Step Brothers is clearly a step up from recent Ferrell offerings like Semi-Pro and Blades of Glory, but please, guys, it's time to grow up and give this formula a rest. **
SWING VOTE There's a terrific segment in the middle of Swing Vote in which the two men running for U.S. president, Republican incumbent Andrew Boone (Kelsey Grammer) and Democratic challenger Donald Greenleaf (Dennis Hopper), are persuaded by their campaign managers (Stanley Tucci and Nathan Lane, respectively) to do anything to win the favor of Texico, N.M., resident Bud Johnson (Kevin Costner), whose single vote will decide the outcome of the election. So when Bud lets it be known that he doesn't care what people do in their own homes, even homosexuals, the right-wing Boone is forced to appear in an ad in which, surrounded by members of the gay community, he cheerfully embraces diversity. And when a comment by Bud is misunderstood to mean that he harbors ill will toward Mexican laborers, the left-wing Greenleaf reluctantly films a TV spot in which he rails against illegal immigrants, even as real immigrants hired as extras dash across the set. These bits are funny, biting and provocative, and they demonstrate that this had an opportunity to emerge as a scathing political satire rather than a timid political comedy. But the central thrust isn't the election as much as it's the bonding between Bud and his daughter (Madeline Carroll). Costner delivers a fine performance, but we see this type of sentimental film just about every month. We're here to watch the electoral process receive a sharp kick in the pants, but Swing Vote isn't inspirational as much as it's simply afraid to take a stand on anything. Given this narrative trajectory, the film ends just as we suspect it would, not with a bang but with a wimp-out. **1/2
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