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The Blotter: Falling Out 

Bizarre crime from Charlotte police files (May 18-24)

Nap Time Police responded to a Rite Aid in the University area last week after someone decided to make themselves at home inside the store. Employees told officers the suspect was in the store for two hours, an odd amount of time to spend in any pharmacy, but they may have just been moving slowly because they were tired. When employees realized they could no longer find the man but hadn't seen him leave, they checked the bathroom, where they found him fast asleep. He apparently had taken quite a fall when he passed out, too, because he had broken the wall off the stall he was found in.

New Recipes A 21-year-old woman living in the University area filed a police report last week after someone ransacked her apartment. It appears the suspect went the extra mile beyond stealing things, however, as this one seemed personal. Officers responded to the woman's apartment at The Flats at Mallard Creek and found that someone had forced entry and poured liquid and food all over her computer desk. The suspect then took picture frames off the wall and shattered them, before fleeing the scene with a $300 tablet and $250 worth of men's clothes.

Fool Me Once A 19-year-old man finally went to police last week after realizing someone he had put his trust in to sell his property may not have had his best interests in mind. The victim told police he had given the suspect his 2000 Honda Accord to sell for him in January, but the suspect had yet to sell it, or so they said. Regardless, the victim gave the same suspect his 2000 Ford F-150 to sell for him in mid-February. By April, one would think the victim would be suspicious, right? Not quite, as he continued to hand over cars, this time giving him a 2003 Cadillac Escalade to sell. Last week, once the suspect stopped answering all his calls and texts, he decided to file a report for theft.

Inspector Batshit A 45-year-old man working at an inspection station in north Charlotte last week called police after one of his potential customers pulled in and got into a fight with him before he could even get to inspecting. The man told police that the suspect pulled into the station, but before he could spend any money, the inspector tried to do him a favor by warning him that he wouldn't pass inspection with his windows tinted completely black. This sent the suspect off, and he huffed and puffed and blew the station down. OK, he didn't do that, but he did yell and scream and at one point even physically pushed the inspector down before fleeing the scene in hopes of finding a more lenient station.

That Sucks A 22-year-old girl living at an off-campus apartment near UNC Charlotte got into a fight with her roommate over cleaning the apartment last week, except it didn't start the way a fight about such things normally does. According to one roommate, she started an argument with her roommate not because she had been failing to clean, but because she had been using her vacuum to do so (which seems like it would be a welcome thing if said roommate was willing to, you know, vacuum) and during the argument the roommate threw a plastic bucket at her. The two then got to pushing and eventually full-fledge fighting in the living room. The victim apparently suffered scratches to her face but refused treatment from Medic.

American Pickers A couple of collectors were the victims of burglaries last week, although one's stolen goods will have a much bigger potential effect on the safety of society as a whole now that they're on the black market. The first victim, a 58-year-old woman from south Charlotte, reported that someone broke into her storage shed and stole $1,500 worth of 1930s baseball cards, $750 worth of NASCAR model cars, $500 worth of Hess truck collectibles and $500 worth of old carousel horses. In an unrelated incident, a south Charlotte woman reported that some long-limbed suspect gained entry into her home by reaching through the doggie door to undo the lock. Once inside, the suspect stole an NFL football signed by the entire 2004 Panthers team, but then things took a darker turn than the above-mentioned incident. The suspect ended up making off with two rifles, five handguns and a shotgun.

Cougar A 61-year-old woman was picked up in north Charlotte last week on a night when she felt young and free again ... but perhaps too young and free. Police said they responded to a call off of Graham Street at about 10:30 p.m. one night and when they arrived they found the woman walking peacefully down the road with no clothes on.

MEDIC! Sometimes the first responders have to come to the aid of the first responders, and that's what happened in east Charlotte last week after a man struck the exact type of vehicle that you want around in the event of an accident. The drivers of a Medic vehicle told police they were driving down Albemarle Road when a car collided with them and then fled the scene. Safe to say nobody in the suspect car was hurt, and fortunately, nobody in the ambulance was either.

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