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The Blotter 

Bizarre crimes from Charlotte police reports

NAILED IT: A nail salon told police that a person left his business without paying for a full set of nail tips. The person claimed to be going to the parking lot to get money but instead got into a vehicle and drove away.

REMEDIAL PARENTING: A woman tells a man to buy diapers. He takes offense. "I'll knock you in the head with a beer bottle." Police arrive. The woman tells the officer she wants the man to be a responsible parent, and she believes jail will do that.

NO WIMP: A woman told police that someone called her more than 1,000 times within two weeks. The suspect said, "I'll show you I have a backbone." How did this suspect plan to do that? Well, the suspect repeatedly said, "I'm gonna choke you and slap you in front of your children."

That's backbone.

YET ANOTHER NIC FIT: A convenience store reported that someone entered the building during the night by knocking a hole in a rear wall. Once inside, the person stole cigarettes valued at $200. He (or she) won't be bumming smokes for awhile.

SIGN FROM ABOVE: So you want to steal a sign. There's a church nearby with a banner that reads, "Where Jesus Christ reigns forever and evermore." You think, "that would look great in my bedroom." (Well, maybe not you, but somebody took it.) The police report notes without explanation that the sign valued at $185 may have violated the city sign ordinance.

BEAUTY ISN'T FREE: A woman stole a $5.99 bottle of Oil of Olay lotion from a drugstore. She was arrested for larceny outside the business.

A PICTURE'S WORTH: A man told police that a family member tore about 30 photographs from the frame on the man's walls, ripped them apart, and threw them in the trash. This family member was the only other person in the house during the incident. There were no signs of forced entry.

Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte Police Department.

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