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The Blotter 

* Nothing to lose: A jail inmate was charged with vandalism after he deliberately knocked a 19-inch color TV from its stand while he was in the common area of the Mecklenburg County Jail.

* That's just not right: A man called police after he discovered someone had broken into his house and stolen several items including a laptop computer, printer, DVD player, and two Blockbuster movie rentals. The most disturbing aspect of the robbery was that the callous thief also made away with a cash-filled blue piggy bank.

* That's gratitude for you: While giving a casual friend a ride home, a woman became engaged in a heated argument with her male passenger. The man became so irate he demanded she stop the car and let him out. Upon exiting the car, the pissy passenger grabbed a bottle and smashed it against the car. He then threatened to kill the female driver.

* Fighting dirty, then clean: A man and woman reported being assaulted by a man who couldn't make up his mind how to proceed. First, the man held a box cutter to the woman's neck, resulting in a small scratch. Then he changed tactics and, looking to add variety to his assault repertoire, he threw bleach on the male victim. Both victims declined medical treatment.

* Sports injury: A young woman and her friend were eating dinner at a local bar when a fight broke out between two men playing foosball. One of the men grabbed a beer bottle and swung it at his adversary, but instead connected with the mouth of the unsuspecting woman trying to eat her dinner. The resulting wound required 15 stitches.

* When you just have to have a sandwich: A store clerk called police after he saw a man enter the store, stuff a jar of mayonnaise in his pocket, and leave the premises without paying. The mysterious mayo bandit is still at large.

* Hey, kids, leave them teachers alone: There were two incidents recently of students assaulting and/or threatening teachers at Charlotte elementary schools. One incident occurred when a rowdy student challenged his teacher to a fight, then proceeded to grab a pair of scissors and approach the teacher in a "threatening manner." In another incident, a student threw a tube of Chapstick at his teacher, striking him in the abdomen " and you know how bad that must have hurt; those Chapstick bruises can be lethal. While he was being removed from the classroom, the rambunctious tyke kicked another teacher in the shin. Still on the rampage, when the little terror was placed in the "quiet room," he pulled the carpet off the walls, causing $200 in damage.

* Serious mailbox haters: An elderly, disabled man reported recently that someone had destroyed his mailbox, for the third time in 12 months. And this was no ordinary mailbox. It sat atop a metal pole, surrounded by 2x8-inch boards, set back about four feet from the road. The suspect(s) struck the mailbox hard enough to split the boards, bend the metal pole and flatten the mailbox.

* That ain't your baby's daddy: A woman called police after she received a threatening phone call from another woman who said "I'm gonna kick your ass. You don't know me, I'm not Mexican." The victim believes the threat was the result of a comment she made to the woman's husband, indicating that their child was "too good looking to be his." The victim stresses she made the comment in a joking manner, but apparently the child's mother didn't get the joke. *

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