About 10 years ago, Asha Sims' life took a turn for the worse. Her relationship with her husband and business partner was falling apart. As a licensed professional counselor, she was familiar with the signs, but she didn't want to recognize them in her own case: She was in a denial about her abusive relationship.

Today, Sims is a model of strength for her clients and she feels firmly rooted in herself. She overcame the rocky end of her marriage and endured for some time with little to no income. For her, the source of her strength did not lie in talk therapy. Instead, she attributes her success to energy work.

"You can put on my tombstone: The woman I am today is due to energy work," Sims says. "It gave me a sense of empowerment."

Energy work refers to practices that are believed to promote spiritual health. For example, Sims' entry into energy work came from Reiki. Typically a client will lie on her back while a licensed Reiki practitioner, or Reiki master, lays her hands over key organs to promote spiritual balance. Another hallmark of energy work is the use of crystals, which are said to channel specific energies into the user's life in order to heal sickness or maintain spiritual wellness.

Pinterest named energy work the No. 1 wellness trend of 2017, based on how many times the topic was pinned. As with much in the spiritual realm, there is little to no scientific evidence to support the effectiveness of energy work, but many practitioners and users cite extraordinary results.

• Asha Sims.

To the skeptics, Sims says that holistic spiritual healing is a partnership and that her clients seek her out. Her goal is not to convert doubters, but to help those who come to her. Many of those clients are women experiencing problems in their relationships or sex lives. Sims believes identifying and overcoming sexual hang-ups, especially in women, is essential to living a spiritually balanced and rooted life.

"We lose our sexual energy, which is our creative life force. Our wombs are what bring life into the world," Sims says.

To determine whether your sex life is where it's supposed to be, Sims recommends nothing more than a simple glance at your feet.

"When you're dating, you want to make sure your feet are not dry, crusty, toenail polish peeling," Sims says. "Those are things I started doing for myself to build that sexual energy back up within me."

If your feet are looking a little worse for wear and your sex life is suffering too, Sims suggests reconnecting with your more sensual self: Take relaxing baths. Uncork a bottle of wine and treat yourself as though you were heading out on a first date. Get into the practice of applying oils and, in the process, appreciating your body. (And don't neglect your feet!)

In addition to practical at-home advice, Sims offers a whole range of services to assist in unlocking the positive energy that she believes comes from harmony and comfort in your sex life. In addition to being a Reiki master, Sims is also a certified Yoni advocate. Yoni eggs are carved stones designed to be worn inside the vagina. She also provides womb saunas, which involve applying steam to the vagina and uterus.

Sims' sensual yoga classes are designed to open hips, strengthen pelvic floor muscles and unlock sexual energy. At first, attendees are skeptical, but by the end of the class, her students are dancing and gyrating as the room pulses with sexual energy. Sims says that sometimes it's too much for her to deal with, and she hopes her clients go home and channel that energy — with a partner or alone.

Before the turning point that changed her life, Sims never imagined herself as the orgasm lady or the Yoni egg lady. But she's also not entirely surprised. She's always loved sex, she says, so she made it her profession. She believes that healthy sexuality leads to an increased capacity for love, creativity and healthy pursuits. "The more healthy orgasms, we don't have time to hate. It's all about love and expression and learning the value of sexual intimacy," she says.

Sims worldview has her won her fans on Facebook, where she regularly posts about sexuality and provides her followers with a forum to talk about sex in ways that they might not be able to otherwise. Whether or not her spiritual healing practice is the best approach for you, her advocacy for healthy sexuality and her efforts to build communication and community around healthy sexuality benefit us all.

Recently, Sims' 6-year-old son wanted to show her a magic trick. She didn't know what to expect. At the end of the trick, he made the big reveal with a flourish.

"It's a ... Yoni egg!"

Sims cracked up. Her son won't know for a while what a Yoni egg is. But plenty of her clients know, and, based on the glowing testimonials on Sims' website, I think they would agree that they can be magical.

It never fails. The conversation is usually the same during the last couple weeks leading up to the end of February. "Well, you know CIAA is next weekend..." *insert awkward pause* as the speaker scans the closest black person's expression or the table for someone (anyone) who will cosign. Why, you may ask? The CIAA – Central Intercollegiate Athletic Association – an NCAA Division II conference of historically black institutions holds its annual basketball tournament around the end of February or beginning of March in our city every year.

If you're new to Charlotte and you haven't heard the murmurings of bar- and clubgoers expressing some version of lackluster investment, congratulations. The rest of us, however, have been hearing the complaints for quite some time – I'm going on year six. The issue in a nutshell? As much as some folks will argue that "race doesn't exist" in Charlotte, weekends like these reveal that the roots of social division are alive and well.

Usually, I use this particular column to discuss all of the CIAA events I've been to in the past, how much money artists throw at a local strip club, who's performing during the weekend or where are the best venues to go. This year, I want to weigh in on the conversations that a lot of publications choose to focus on, whether positive or negative.

In my opinion – that's what you say when you're trying to maintain some sense of political correctness, right? – it's no different than the "surprise" that's expressed every single time the #blacklivesmatter movement resurges in the city. "I don't understand what all of this about?" some state in exasperation every single time a stone is thrown in the direction of social homogeneity.

The question of whether or not one is going to engage in CIAA events, let alone leave the city, is a question or statement that comes up every single year around this time.

For one, there have been many articles written on the simple fact that the amount of people that actually attend the tournament has continued to decline over the years. Instead, the focus has shifted toward the multitude of day and night parties that take place in the city between Thursday and Friday (check our guide on page 16) and the high-profile violence that can sometimes occur at said events (already there are articles about Young Dolph returning to CLT after surviving a 100-bullet barrage in 2017). And yet, in the grand scheme of things, the weekend generates millions of dollars in revenue for the city.

The larger conversation, most of the time, is much more centered around...you guessed it, race. Let's not tip-toe around the fact that a tournament based around HBCUs is going to bring in people of color. And given our social environment with regards to racial tension, anytime there's a large influx in the city, there's always a perception that drama is going to follow. Hence, headlines like "Why the outrage over CIAA gunfire?" and "Yes, your leaving Charlotte to avoid black people during CIAA is racist."

But can we argue that these headlines, despite the fact that they have a clickbait flair, are getting right to the heart of the dynamics that exist from a cultural standpoint in Charlotte. Just last week, jokes were flying about how much gunfire, hip-hop music and how many motorcycles will be running the streets of Charlotte. But the real question should be, if the city is benefitting from a financial standpoint and we aren't seriously considering it going anywhere else, how do we move forward in a positive way? And then, how do we shift the conversation to the larger view of why there's always a division when it comes to nightlife experiences?

I don't know that there's a definitive answer. I've talked to people from a diverse array of perspectives that are grounded in race, religion, gender and sexuality. Not to mention, I come from a unique perspective with regards to all of those categories and I can say that the allure of nightlife in general has faded as I've gotten older. And I certainly understand navigating different spaces with regards to all of those things despite a certain level of comfortability. As an added bonus, I've worked as a hostess during CIAA and I've actually gone to a multitude of events.

Looking ahead to All Star Weekend in 2019, I begin to think about the fact that there will be yet another event that will bring a familiar dynamic to the Queen City. I am interested to see if we can begin to discuss what it is that fractures our nightlife scene and figure out a way to bridge a variety of gaps.

A long weekend in the Queen City usually implies a long weekend of drinking. That's right, your girl had Monday off in observance of President's Day. When I wasn't spending time with friends, I was enjoying sleep competitions with my sweetheart.

Even though I hadn't gotten much sleep on Thursday night, my boo thang had suggested we attend Science on the Rocks on Friday. I was exhausted, but he'd never been before and my adventures with him are always worth the trip – even when they are absent of food, sleep and water. Not to mention, after our first Valentine's Day together — I finally got to try Customshop Handcrafted Food, eek – I wanted to keep the celebrations going.

If you've been living under a rock, or you're new to Charlotte, or just a creature of habit, you may not know exactly what Science on the Rocks (#sotr) is. Let me break it down for you. It's an adults-only event that takes place at the Discovery Place, a two-story family-friendly (usually) science museum located Uptown at the corner of North Tryon and 6th streets.

A gander at Discovery Place's official website describes the event with the statement, "Science is shaken, not stirred, every third Friday of the month at Science on the Rocks." When I first heard about the after-hours event back in 2014, I couldn't resist a visit. The only thing missing from the usual daytime drip to Discovery Place is a cocktail, after all.

That following March, I was sipping on a "vaportini" at the event all by myself. Since then, I've been back for at least four or five more such events, including the Wizarding World of Harry Potter (a theme that has occurred twice and sold out almost immediately each time).

I read the description for this past week's theme: "Is the way to your lover's heart really through the stomach? Can certain foods actually increase your sex drive? There's no denying it — food, love and sex share a special link that all comes down to science. Romance is in the air and there's more to explore than just chemistry at Science on the Rocks: Flirting with Food."

Anyone who knows me knows that I am obsessed with food, so it seemed like a great idea. Plus, the description reminded me of the time I took my mom to a SOTR experience that was all about the "birds and the bees," where I watched in silent torture next to her while someone slowly placed a condom on a banana...

I fought through the after-work urge to take a nap and met up with my boo. The event always runs from 5 to 9 p.m., so I thought it would be a good idea to head over around 7:30 — not too early, not too late. And even though this approach has worked in the past, showing up later this time wasn't the best idea.

We purchased tickets at the door (yes, that's a thing) and perused the map of events. I hadn't always participated in the activities before, but this time the list seemed pretty interesting: Sex and Aphrodisiacs, Candy Chemistry, The Dating Game, Fruit Relay and Kinky Kitchen Trivia. Unfortunately, every time we went by a room designated for an activity, the class was full. Interested parties had to have tickets to enter and others had to wait for the next time slot and hope they could get in. Bummer.

Nevertheless, the first item I wanted to check off of my to-do list was grab a drink. "Victoria's Other Secret," a pre-mixed vodka and lemonade number was being served at the two makeshift bars upstairs. Even though the price tag was $9+, I thought I'd give it a chance. Surprisingly, two tiny drinks later, I was feeling the buzz.

We accepted the fact that we weren't going to get into any of the activities and decided to just browse the other exhibits that are featured on a daily basis. Frogs, jellyfish and the like. By the time we finished that – and I laughed at my boo for accidentally splashing the water in the huge, open fish tank – we'd put the last hour of SOTR behind us.

Before you plan your visit to SOTR, there are a few pro-tips to keep in mind: Buy your tickets online and early ($10). There's no guarantee that the event won't sell out and they end online sales early on the day of the event.You can buy tickets at the door, however, the price goes up to $12. And again, there's no guarantee they'll be available. Show up as early as you can. That way, you'll be able to catch as many events as possible. You'd be surprised how quickly 9 p.m. will roll around. If you bring cash, you'll be able to cut down your wait time in line at the bar. But make sure you bring a decent amount...the drinks aren't cheap. Don't forget, you can purchase tickets to an IMAX show at 7:30 p.m. for an additional $5. Not too shabby for a quick movie experience!

Is anyone actually calling it Northside Station?

If you've explored nightlife in Charlotte, especially Uptown, you know that the "building" that used to house Bar Charlotte and Republic Nite Club is now called Northside Station. That's where you'll find Lucky's Bar & Arcade, Flight Beer Garden & Music Hall, Tavolo (R.I.P. from what I hear) and The Imperial.

The first time I went to The Imperial, I was toasted. Beforehand, I'd gone to Science on the Rocks: Wizarding World at the Discovery Place. I was so excited about the chance to experience Harry Potter in the Queen City, however, it ended up being lackluster. I don't know why I thought butter beer would taste better in Charlotte than it did at Harry Potter World in Orlando. Nevertheless, my friend and I enjoyed what we could.

Once we had our fill, we left and went to The Local, and eventually, I decided to brave Charlotte nightlife alone and head to Lucky's Bar & Arcade.

Bad idea. I grabbed an RBV, or three, and headed straight for the Jurassic Park arcade game.

It's one of my faves at Lucky's and that night, someone was celebrating a birthday. That meant free coins for the random bargoer hogging a two-player game: a.k.a me.

Next thing you know, I'm in the bathroom fighting for my life before 10 p.m.

I collected myself to meet some friends at The Imperial around the corner. It was my first time and I didn't know if I would even be able to handle the epic cocktails that I'd heard so much about.

I was right.

All I remember was one of my friends and I ordering the same charred drink with ashes in it. Coincidence? I think not.

The second time? My parents were visiting and we went straight to the rooftop bar. Don't get me wrong, I loved every second of the fall breeze on that rooftop. However, I learned very quickly that the rooftop bar doesn't serve the same cocktails as the bar downstairs. Bummer.

Needless to say, after quick and blurry experiences, I was excited to revisit the jazz venue this past weekend.

One of my good friends and old co-workers was celebrating a birthday and wanted to get the girls together for a night out.

This mop I call hair kept me from being on time, but I was still able to take note of the highlights. I walked up the front stairs to the entrance of The Imperial and showed my ID.

There were way more patrons than I remember seeing the first time around. The lighting wasn't too dim, unique for a jazz bar, and there was plenty of seating: cozy booths along the wall on the left, a bar on the right. When I walked to the back, there was a small stage. On that stage, a live jazz band that was getting after it.

I'm not going to lie, it was kind of loud given the small space, but there's something about jazz instruments that I don't want to ignore. No matter how loud they are.

I surveyed the crowd as I walked toward the bathroom. It was awesome to see how diverse the crowd was as I walked toward the back of the venue.

And what was more exciting? The menu was just as diverse. I didn't have time to grab a cocktail of my own on this visit, but I did have time to taste the Bourbon Evergreens.

I glanced at the other drink options wondering if I'd find extravagant prices. Nope.

Compared to newer venues like Merchant & Trade, the stiff drinks that The Imperial's bartenders are serving up are worth the $12 price tag from what I can tell!

Whether you're more of the lounge-goer or a rooftop porch pigeon, you'll love the vibes at The Imperial.

This venue's laid-back atmosphere coupled with live jazz music on the weekends makes for the perfect date night spot or better yet, Galentine's destination. By the time I arrived to revisit the layout of the venue, my girls were ready to head to Connolly's, The Local and Tilt.

That's how you know the drinks at The Imperial have to be heavy in alcohol. Why? Gone are the days of making more than two moves in a night, let alone in a matter of a couple hours.

Before you head to a stuffier destination for live music in the Q.C., check out The Imperial. Based on multiple experiences, this last one being the most memorable, the venue won't disappoint.

Pro tip: If you're interested in a "galactic ride," try the social media favorite – the Amethyst Garden martini.

Do you have other favorite jazz spots? Drop them in my inbox, because I think I feel a jazz phase coming on.

I'd completely forgotten about Valentine's Day until I came across my first meme of the year: Valentine's Day approaching! What y'all gettin'? The response: A snap from team Snapchat. Yep, it's that time of year again. Bring on the memes from the bitter single folk and those obsessed with their significant others. Thankfully, I've got a boo thang that's going to keep me from being bitter this year. But then I started thinking about what we were going to do.

Every year, this particular holiday sneaks up on me and I end up ordering something last minute. It never fails! If you plan it right, however, you won't have to worry as much about pulling out all the stops – especially in the gift department. I was thumbing over the idea of buying a subscription to Datebox around Christmas time, and now's as good a time as ever to revisit.

The concept is fairly simple – which has the tendency to get on my nerves when I think about how easy it could be to become a stay-at-home mom. Your monthly subscription includes a fully planned date delivered straight to your door. You could choose to get the details of your date delivered to your email or, if you're willing to pay more, delivered to your door. Of course, Charlotte isn't on the list of cities available just yet. But I immediately started thinking how easy it would be to put together the perfect Valentine's Day in the Q.C. without a pricey subscription.

Here are some ideas of things you can do with your special someone on V-Day around the Queen City that won't disappoint:

Get buzzed at a Hornets game. Have you been putting off inviting your sweetie to a sporting event? He or she may not be as invested in the game as you are (or maybe he/she will be) but I guarantee you a nice buzz at a game will lead to a good conversation about the birds and the bees once you leave. There's even a game on Valentine's Day.

Try a new local restaurant. Let's be real, dinner would probably win the award for most popular response on Family Feud. However, you don't have to stick with the stereotypical, break-the-bank restaurants. Instead, look up a local restaurant you haven't tried yet. Hi Tide Poke & Raw Bar is amazing. Not to mention, some bowl ingredients (plus, the raw oysters) are aphrodisiacs.

Get active. Maybe you're not ready to showcase your sensual skills at a couple's yoga class at Blue Blaze Brewing. But that doesn't mean you can't get active with your boo thang somewhere else. Yoga with kitties at Mac Tabby Cat Café or axe throwing at Lumberjaxe are great alternatives to a very public display of affection, wink wink.

"Wine" down. Grabbing a bottle of wine and getting your sip on is a good date that very few people would argue with (except maybe your friends in recovery). However, you can switch up the scenery and get away from slapping the bag at home to keep it interesting. Snag a tree house dinner with a beautiful view and a bottle – or two – of wine at Treehouse Vineyards' just a short drive away instead. Or, look up local wine and design classes and take home a memento of #VDay2018.

Give "love is blind" a whole new meaning. I was out of town when an intriguing charity event benefiting the blind took place. The idea was that guests would eat their meal "in the dark" opening their minds to the lived experience of those without eyesight. At the same time, patrons would be awakening their other senses. Take "nightlife" to a whole new level when you rent a private room at your fave restaurant (or at home), blindfold one another and see where the meal takes you ... yum.

Bring your favorites to the crib. Come on, sometimes "Netflix and chill" is all you need to enjoy time with your favorite person. You can even do it big by picking up food from your favorite restaurant or better yet, head to the grocery store and make dinner together - #sushichallenge. What's even better? Valentine's Day is on a hump day and you'll already be home. Thank me later.

Those are just a few ideas for you Queen City lovebirds. But don't forget, almost all of the things on this list can be just as fun for the single folk. Grab your girls or your guys and celebrate the love you have for your favorite pals – y'all won't have to worry about a petty fight either! What are your plans for an epic Valentine's Day night out in the Q.C.?! Share them with me at backtalk@clclt.com, I'm trying to have an amazing hump day!