Li’l Kim Sentenced to Prison for Perjury
New prison outfit will include white-and-black-striped pasties and thong.
Uptown Freaks Out
Some thugs show their asses and a few people pee in a cemetery and suddenly it’s a “riot.”
Arts & Science Council Gives$12.5 Million More to Area Culture Groups
That could have bought everyone in the county a whole lot of pink flamingos and velvet Elvises.
Shut Up About the Weather Already
Local TV drives viewers nuts with panic-mode reports on upcoming storms. It’s the South, it’s summer, it’s gonna storm, OK?
Bush Pledges Not to Use Abortion Litmus Test for Supreme Court Nominee
It’s just a coincidence that none of the 200+ federal judges he’s appointed support abortion rights.
G8 to Live8: “What? What? I Can’t Hear Ya”
So much for aging rockers’ delusions of influence on politics.
Lockstep South Supports Dubya No Matter What
New Zogby poll: much of the country supports impeaching Bush if he lied about reasons for going to war, but only 34 percent in the South. Fifty-eight percent of South say they’d also support the Prez even if he drowned puppies, burned babies with cigarettes and pushed elderly women in front of moving vehicles.
This article appears in Jul 13-19, 2005.
