Dear Karma Cleanser:
About three years ago I dated this guy named “Mark.” On two separate occasions, I kissed a guy while partying with some girlfriends. Needless to say, months later our relationship was on the rocks, but for other reasons.
Mark went out of town for a couple of months and ended up meeting another girl. There is a 50/50 chance he may have cheated on me with her. We broke up and continued to be friends while he dated this other girl. Now, two years later (and after his break up), we have been seeing only each other for a year.
Should I just come to terms that what goes around comes around? Or am I a hypocrite for still being hurt about our break up? To make matters even worse, we are best friends and honestly enjoy each other’s company. What do you think?
—— Circean Girlfriend
The Karma Cleanser hears about situations like yours all the time, where one partner plants the seeds of deception and the other nurtures the vine to fruition. Don’t call yourself a hypocrite, but realize that — in a basic sense — you started it. So what if he cheated? What matters is the truth of the relationship that exists in this present moment, not any lingering thorns from the past.
Dear Karma Cleanser:
I live with a guy who is a producer and sometimes on-air reporter on the TV news. I would not say that we are very close, but I have become friends with him during the months that we have lived together. On the air, my roommate looks like a clean cut guy, and he makes frequent appearances at charity events in our city. Everyone thinks he’s a sweet person, a real asset to the community. I know the truth because I live with him. He’s a drugged-up mess who has sex with strangers and doesn’t pay the rent on time. He has lost a lot of weight in the past few months because of his lifestyle.
Is there karma for appearing one way to the public and being another way in real life? Will my karma be impacted by living with such a hypocrite?
—— Eyewitness Nudes
There’s karma in everything. If you pretend to be one person but are actually another, the ruse will be exposed in an unexpected and public way. Also, if you sit idly by and let someone close to you drown without trying to help them, you can bet the universe will reward you accordingly. Throw the reporter a rope before he becomes the subject of a segment on his own newscast.
Been bad? karmacleanser@gmail.com.
This article appears in Jun 21-27, 2006.
