NEW RELEASES
BARBERSHOP 2: BACK IN BUSINESS How many years — heck, maybe months — before we can expect to see a weekly Barbershop series on primetime television? With its large cast of diverse characters and a set-up that allows a continuous string of rotating plotlines, this film franchise might eventually find a second home on TV once the box office receipts start drying up. Even Barbershop 2 doesn’t feel like a sequel to the 2002 hit as much as a continuation, with the entire primary cast returning to protect the establishment from yet another outside threat. In the first film, it was a loan shark who wanted to buy the property and turn it into a strip joint; here, it’s a slick businessman (Harry Lennix) whose ambition to “upgrade” the neighborhood includes opening a chain salon (Nappy Cutz) directly across the street from the venerable family shop owned by Calvin (series star Ice Cube). No better and no worse than its predecessor, this likable, lackadaisical comedy proves more focused than the first film yet lacks much of its comic bite, with even Cedric the Entertainer (as opinionated Eddie) forced to marginally tone down his act. Queen Latifah appears briefly as a stylist at the neighborhood beauty parlor, thereby laying the groundwork for her own film, the upcoming Beauty Shop. 
1/2
CURRENT RELEASES
ALONG CAME POLLY OK, so the stars have no chemistry together (Jennifer Aniston’s channeling Diane Keaton in Annie Hall, Ben Stiller’s channeling Ben Stiller in just about everything). And writer-director John Hamburg doesn’t even begin to mine the comic possibilities of his premise, which examines the budding relationship between an overly cautious businessman who analyzes the risk factor in everything and an easy-going woman with a blind ferret and a spontaneous nature. Not to mention, the potty humor goes waaay overboard. Yet two factors save this from being a disaster: a terrific supporting cast, and Hamburg’s ability to nail the little moments even as he’s screwing up the big picture. These factors allow the film to provide more laughs than one would have initially thought possible. 1/2
THE BIG BOUNCE It wasn’t that long ago that Owen Wilson was the cinematic equivalent of a mosquito: noisy, bothersome, and deserving of a good smack. Yet his blond, bland, surfer-boy shtick has grown on me, and indeed, he proves to be the MVP of this souffle-light adaptation of Elmore Leonard’s novel. As a small-timer running scams in Hawaii, he and former model Sara Foster make a sexy couple, and director George Armitage brings to the project the same degree of playful insouciance that informed his previous film, Grosse Pointe Blank. But with a running time just shy of 90 minutes, the feeling emerges that a third of the movie was left on the cutting-room floor, as evidenced by jarring transitions in plot and character development and the ill use of several actors (including Morgan Freeman). Gorgeous location shooting, though. 1/2
THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT In this redundant sci-fi tale, Ashton Kutcher plays a troubled college student haunted by a horrific childhood that managed to incorporate pedophilia, a psychotic dad, a dead baby, and a dog set on fire. But after discovering that, by accessing the journals he kept as a kid, he’s able to travel back to that period in time, he sets about changing the events of his life — and in effect creates alternate realities about as dismal as the one he left behind. Initially intriguing, this quickly turns silly and then eventually wears out its welcome altogether: By the time Kutcher makes his umpteenth time jump, I was praying that we would all end up landing in a better movie. 1/2
CHEAPER BY THE DOZEN I haven’t seen the 1950 original, yet something inside me — call it my sixth sense for cinematic sacrilege — tells me that it didn’t include a sequence in which a kid slips in the puddle of puke that his brother produced moments earlier. Sure, it’s a gut-buster for the under-12 set, and had the movie limited its idiocy to merely including yuck-o moments like this one to appease the crusty-snot-noses in the audience, it might have been mildly tolerable. But this half-baked Dozen is incompetent at every turn and shameless on every level, with its heartwarming moments more likely to cause heartburn and its comedic bits about as funny as a mad hornet in the mouth. As the dad forced to baby-sit a houseful of kids, Steve Martin continues to fritter away a once vibrant career.
CITY OF GOD Thanks to its four surprise Oscar nominations (including a nod for director Fernando Meirelles), one of the best films of 2003 has been re-released nationally, so there’s no reason not to catch it the second time around. Based on actual events, this Brazilian import takes a hard look at a Rio De Janeiro slum and dissects the lifestyle of the youthful thugs who rule this “war zone” with a bloody fist. Admittedly, it’s tough to withstand 130 minutes of continuous nihilism, but Meirelles and his contributors are so completely in command of this material (the storytelling moves like mercury) that it’s impossible not to get caught up in their descent into Hell on Earth. 1/2
THE COOLER Bernie Lootz (William H. Macy), a sad sack whose very presence causes everyone around him to experience bad luck, is employed by Vegas casino manager Shelly Kaplow (Alec Baldwin) to “cool” off customers enjoying a hot streak. Yet once Bernie falls for a sympathetic cocktail waitress named Natalie (Maria Bello), he begins to spread good luck, a situation that calls for drastic measures on Shelly’s part. The romance between Bernie and Natalie is both believable and extremely touching, and Macy and Bello deserve kudos for their uninhibited (in all senses of the word) performances. Yet it’s Baldwin who delivers the most memorable turn: As an “old-school” Vegas bigwig whose brutality mingles uneasily with his unusual code of honor, he hasn’t been this good since his pitbull act in 1992’s Glengarry Glen Ross.
GIRL WITH A PEARL EARRING The plot can be dismissed by crotchety viewers as borderline soap opera — in more modern times, its character dynamics could easily play out on the Ewing ranch in Dallas — but this adaptation of Tracy Chevalier’s speculative book about 17th century Dutch painter Johannes Vermeer (Colin Firth) and his 17-year-old muse (Scarlett Johansson) soars primarily because of its visuals, an appropriate strength for a movie about an artist. Vermeer’s pieces are notable for their meticulous attention to detail as well as their astonishing capture of light and use of color; working in tandem with ace cinematographer Eduardo Serra and production designer Ben Van Os, director Peter Webber follows suit by transforming his film into a live-action facsimile of a Vermeer painting.
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE RETURN OF THE KING Pulling off a successful threepeat, director Peter Jackson wraps up J.R.R. Tolkien’s fantasy saga with a dazzling chapter guaranteed to please true believers. At 200 minutes, the movie is long but not necessarily overlong: The super-sized length allows many cast members to strut their stuff, and several new creatures, from an army of ghostly marauders to a gigantic spider in the best Harryhausen tradition, are staggering to behold. Ultimately, though, this final act belongs to the ringbearer Frodo (Elijah Wood) and his companions, faithful Sam (Sean Astin) and treacherous Gollum (the brilliant CGI creation voiced by Andy Serkis). This is a movie of expensive visual effects and expansive battle scenes, but when it comes to truly making its mark, we have to thank all the little people. 1/2
MASTER AND COMMANDER: THE FAR SIDE OF THE WORLD Based on Patrick O’Brian’s series of novels, this casts Russell Crowe as Captain Jack Aubrey, a British naval hero assigned to bring down a formidable French vessel during the Napoleonic Wars. For a swashbuckling epic, the film is rather subdued in its approach, with director Peter Weir taking great pains to present an oft-times understated tale that’s about the art of warfare as much as it’s about the battles themselves. Paul Bettany, Crowe’s A Beautiful Mind co-star, portrays the ship’s doctor (and Aubrey’s best friend), and it’s the relationship between their two characters — coupled with Weir’s attention to minute detail — that largely drives the story.
MIRACLE This Disney release is being promoted as “From The Studio That Brought You The Rookie And Remember The Titans,” and that’s clearly the best way to market this piece. Like those sports-illustrated endeavors, this one’s also an acceptably middlebrow drama that asks nothing more of its audience members than to cheer at the appropriate moments and, if theater management doesn’t mind, get a “Wave” going during the climactic Big Game. Here, the focus is on coach Herb Brooks (Kurt Russell) and the 20 kids who formed the US Ice Hockey team that somehow managed to beat the formidable Russian squad during the 1980 Olympics. 1/2
MONSTER Anyone who’s been paying attention knows that Charlize Theron is more than just a pretty face, yet her mesmerizing turn in writer-director Patty Jenkins’ fact-based drama will finally allow the rest of the world to catch up. It isn’t simply that Theron gained weight and thoroughly deglamorized herself to play the part of Aileen Wuornos, the prostitute who killed several men in Florida before finally being caught and executed. It’s that she so completely buries herself in this woman’s impetuousness, rage and vulnerability that she simply ceases to exist; it’s a galvanizing performance in a difficult yet important film that manages to present Wuornos as both monster and victim. 1/2
MYSTIC RIVER Director Clint Eastwood has fashioned a strong drama about three childhood friends brought together years later by a tragedy. Jimmy Markum (Sean Penn) may have a violent past, but he fiercely loves his daughter and is shattered when she’s found murdered. One of Jimmy’s former pals (Kevin Bacon) is the detective assigned to the case, while the other former chum (Tim Robbins) emerges as a leading suspect. The performances are immaculate, and Brian Helgeland’s script addresses several noteworthy themes, meaty enough that the utter obviousness of the mystery feels even more of a cheat. Still, despite its shortcomings, the acting and the atmospherics continue to haunt me, meaning this emerged as last year’s best disappointment.
THE TRIPLETS OF BELLEVILLE This animated treat from France makes Finding Nemo look about as cutting-edge as an old Tom & Jerry cartoon. Its jumping-off point is a lonely little boy who, thanks to the support of his kindly grandmother, grows up to become an accomplished cyclist set to take part in the Tour de France. But after the lad gets kidnapped by the French Mafia, it’s up to his granny and their aging pooch Bruno to rescue him; along the way, they receive unexpected aid from the title trio, elderly singing sisters who used to perform with Fred Astaire and Josephine Baker back in the day. Mere words cannot convey the sheer inventiveness of this enterprise, a melting pot of styles and storylines borrowed from (among others) Buster Keaton, Tex Avery and Jean-Pierre Jeunet. 1/2
This article appears in Feb 11-17, 2004.
