League of combinations
A female coworker likes to push my buttons with her occasional flirtations. I know I’m not special, because I’ve seen her make the same moves on other men in the organization. She also has a boyfriend she indicates is an important part of her life. She seems to pay attention to me or back off depending on how well her relationship’s going. This is a woman I’m very attracted to, but I wonder whether making a play for her will put my job on the line.–Flirty Something
Don’t count on getting your doctorate in nonverbal communication anytime soon. If this woman ran you over in her car, you’d see it as a sign that she wants to take you home with her — that is, whatever little bits of you stick between the treads after she makes it through the speed bumps.
In flirting, context is everything. If a woman smiles in your direction, it could be a sign that she wants you. If the woman is 90, it’s probably a sign that she wants you to carry her groceries. (Then again, it could be a sign that her support hose are riding up something fierce.)
The context, in your button-pusher’s case, points to her rabid disinterest in anything beyond toying with you and the rest of the corporate herd. Will making a play for her put your job on the line? I have no idea. It sure won’t do your ego any favors.
Copyright 2002, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave., #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405, or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com).
This article appears in Jul 31 – Aug 6, 2002.
