Vice President Dick Cheney admitted Friday on Faux News that he “probably” cursed at Senator Patrick Leahy (D-Vermont) on the US Senate floor last week. Cheney, who has been drawing more fire than usual the past couple of weeks over his insistence that Iraq was working directly with al Qaeda, said he didn’t regret his outburst and added that he “felt better afterwards.”
Mr. Cheney, as you know, is a polarizing political figure who opponents cast as the power behind the throne, the personification of chicken-hawk militarism, corporate corruption, and big brother mentality. It’s no wonder then that he needs to blow off some of the steam generated by the heat he takes. As far as I’m concerned, the Vice President telling a senior Senator to “go fuck yourself” on the Senate floor is really no big deal, although proper etiquette calls for saying “the gentleman from Vermont should go fuck himself.” Despite the born again, let’s bring back civility Bushit the administration mires itself in, the fact that politicians (and regular folks) sometimes talk (and behave) like sailors in port should be no shocking revelation to anyone.
What I am curious about involves a hypothetical situation. VP Cheney’s suggestion to Sen. Leahy occurred when members of the Senate gathered for a formal portrait on the chamber floor; the Senate was not officially in session. What would the ramifications have been if Cheney’s “little floor debate” occurred while the Senate was in session, in other words, being broadcast on C-SPAN?
The FCC recently increased the maximum per incident fine for indecency on the airways to $32,500. There are bills pending to increase that fine to somewhere between $275,000 and $500,000. Would the FCC treat Cheney like Howard Stern? If so, would his fine go into the general treasury coffers or would Cheney just send it directly to Halliburton as sort of a payment to his Cuss Jar?
I’m also a little curious about how President Bush, who seeks to constitutionally legislate sexuality, feels about Cheney’s suggestion on moral grounds. But then again “fucking yourself” may be less of a crude sexual expletive then just a more truthful way of saying “Vote Republican.”
This article appears in Jun 30 – Jul 6, 2004.
