I was reading my friend’s Facebook profile last night and she’d posted a quiz of how well do you know me.
Out of the ten questions, I only got three correct and this is someone I’d known for over 20 years. That quiz made me think, do we know the person lying in bed next to us? Maybe you know that he or she likes it when you get on top or likes it up the ass, but do you know what’s going on in their mind when they are quietly sitting in a corner?
Why don’t we know more about people we sleep with, date and marry?
I’m sure the Cabarrus County woman who’s husband used Craigslist to find a man to rape her didn’t know how perverted and violent he was. Think about the women who are married to school teachers accused of having sex with young girls, did they know their husbands were child molesters?
People keep secrets, but when you’re lusting after a person you don’t think about what lies beneath that slick exterior that caught your eye.
We need to change that.
In this microwave world, we don’t always know who we are messing with. That sexy MF could end up being that crazy SOB who tries to kill you and your family.
How do you find out what’s inside your lover’s mind? You have to read between the lines — logically, that is.
For example, if he says “I don’t want a relationship.”
He doesn’t want a relationship and no amount of sex and blow jobs will change his mind.
Same for women and if you find out that three months later she’s dating someone else, that just meant she was trying to let you down easily.
Talking to the person you’re sleeping with about things that matter can alert you to whether or not you’re sleeping with the enemy. And make sure your talk with this person covers more than the Kama Sutra.
This article appears in Jun 9-16, 2009.
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