By Brooke Edge
Why do I keep getting excited when I see that 1976’s The Bad News Bears is on television, momentarily getting ready to cancel the day’s plans and call my mom so we can both settle in on our respective couches and chuckle over the ridiculously politically incorrect slurs coming out of tiny, towheaded 10-year-old boys’ mouths?
I should have realized by now that for the past few years, TBS has replaced the classic, where Walter Matthau is drunkenly inappropriate, with the crappy 2005 ersatz Bears, in which Billy Bob Thornton is awful.
So, rather than sitting around and moping, here are some inspirational words — courtesy of Coach Morris Buttermaker — to get you through the day:
“Listen, Lupus, you didn’t come into this life just to sit around on a dugout bench, did ya? Now get your ass out there and do the best you can.”
This article appears in May 12-19, 2009.
