OK, so you made it through another grueling workweek without killing anybody (I hope). Chances are, however, that you were probably so busy busting your ass for the man — or searching for a job because the man laid you off — that you didn’t have time to keep up with exactly what happened this week.

Well, don’t fret. We here at Creative Loafing keep minute-by-minute tabs on all the shit you love — news, food, film, music, sex, shopping and more; as a result, we are probably the best folks to fill you in on the most interesting stuff that’s happened all week.

So, check it out: Below this witty set of sentences you’ll find our list of people, places and things (with links) that made the last 5-7 days worth rewinding. Behold:

• Wanda Sykes verbally smacked Rush Limbaugh’s fat ass … and a bunch of other people, too.

• Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps visited Charlotte to compete. And, no, I won’t make any weed jokes.

• We uncovered secrets behind Adam Lambert’s early days … and, seemingly, pissed off thousands of American Idol fans.

• Bacon flavored vodka is coming your way. Seriously.

• A Charlotte-based bar made Esquire magazine’s Best Bars of America list. Which bar? Click on the link and find out!

• Looks like Mike Minter wants to go to Washington … and no, not for the Redskins.

• We made a list of the top 5 cheap eats on Central Ave. You know you want some cheap food.

• Obama slobbered over the Tar Heels. Cool shit.

• Music Editor Jeff Hahne offered up all the info about Charlotte’s two newest music venues — both set to open at the N.C. Music Factory in June. And then Brittney Cason, our resident nightlife writer, gave up some info about the Music Factory’s soon-to-open bars.

• Oh and then Jeff poked fun at Lady Gaga … because she’s a dreadful artist. I pray you don’t like her.

• One of NC Dance Theatre’s longest-running dancers is leaving. Damn.

• You can get thick, psychotic hair like Rod Blagojevich. For real.

• We found out why you should never complain at the Waffle House.

• The local band The Stellas are in Asia on tour — but that didn’t stop the crew from blogging for CL. Check out what they wrote about their trip so far.

• National Public Radio kicked up some shit over the film Outrage.

• Nude pics of Rihanna surfaced. Maybe.

• We snapped pics of O.A.R.’s performance Uptown.

• Recession hitting you hard? It may be time to start shaking your ass for cash.

• Look: yard sale. Yay!

• Why do you need an orgasm? Well, here’s what we think

• We checked out opening night of Othello and snapped a few pics.

• CL Film Editor Matt Brunson watched the new film Angels & Demons … and it appears that he didn’t like it.

• We found out why bikers are coming to Myrtle Beach whether you like it or not.

• And here’s my favorite video we posted this week. Let it be a lesson to anyone who thinks they won the lottery:

https://youtube.com/watch?v=G0VNC2C6JsY%26hl%3Den%26fs%3D1

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