Timmy D., strippers, and the Founding Fathers

It’s time for the Stupid Thing of the Week! We had numerous contenders for this week’s award, so let’s start with a brief list of the runners-up.

4. Rep. Joe Barton (R-TX). Talk about misjudging the voters’ mindset — not to mention cutting your own throat! Barton, a wholly owned subsidiary of the international oil industry, stuck his foot in his mouth, and probably in at least one other orifice, during a House committee meeting Thursday when he apologized to Tony Hayward, the CEO of BP, and said he was “ashamed” of the White House’s effort to get a guarantee of $20 billion from BP for Gulf Coast restoration, an effort Barton called “a shakedown.” Republican leaders freaked out, afraid that voters would somehow, in some way, think that the GOP is subservient to the oil industry, and forced Barton to apologize for his apology – which he also screwed up, saying his clear statements had been “misconstrued.” Barton’s House boss, John Boehner, turned several different new shades of orange, and before you could say “Blowout preventer,” Barton had to apologize again. (what a sorry day for Barton, huh? Sorry).

3. ABC wastes your money again. Six Charlotte strippers were arrested for indecent exposure. Yes, I understand it was because, as an ABC enforcement stud put it, “they took off their bottoms” (OUCH!), and Johnny Law is “just doing his job,” but, umm, isn’t indecent exposure the whole point of strip clubs?

2. My man Tim D’Annunzio, 8^th District Congressional candidate from the planet Xoltron, wanted everyone to know he’s not as batshit crazy as he has been portrayed in the media. So, naturally, he went on Keith Larson’s popular WBT talk show, where he got into a shouting match and told Larson there’s “a special place in hell” for the talk show host.

1. Rick Barber, this week’s winner, is an Alabama Tea Partier and GOP congressional candidate  who is in hot water for seemingly advocating violence against the federal government in a paid TV commercial. That’s bad enough, but the ad itself is what’s truly stupid — make that silly, awful and stupid. The commercial shows Barber in a tavern, talking (or rather, hyperventilating) to three of the Founding Fathers and telling them of all the horrific things the federal government is doing to Americans these days, like making them pay taxes and buy health insurance and, um terrible stuff like that. At the end, a guy who apparently is supposed to be George Washington, squints and melodramatically declares, “Gather. Your. Armies.” It’s the latest and most blatant example of tea partiers abusing (or, let’s face it, just plain misunderstanding) the roles and views of Washington, Adams, Franklin, Hamilton & Co. to make our revolutionary forbears seem as paranoid and irrational as, say, Rick Barber. Watch Barber’s commercial below:

This article appears in Jun 15-21, 2010.