Good Friend: A 61-year-old man called police after some of his property was stolen while he was moving. He told officers that a friend of his was helping him move. The friend took one load of furniture in his truck and never showed up at the new residence. The victim called his (now former) friend and the suspect denied having anything to do with it. You have to be suspicious when someone is eager to help you move. That’s all I’m saying.
Ask For It: A 35-year-old woman reported her laptop stolen at a Holiday Inn where she works. The woman told police that she was on break, using the laptop at the bar when she left and went to the restroom. When she returned, the laptop was gone. A witness saw a man walk up and casually put the computer in his bag as if he owned it. How could people be so stupid and be surprised when it bites them on the ass? You’re at a bar for God’s sake. Ask a co-worker to watch it.
Falcons Fans: Employees at Cheeze Mo’z, a restaurant owned by former Panther linebacker Dan Morgan, called police when their store was vandalized. Right around noon, a group of kids drove by in a car and paint-balled the storefront glass. You have to be careful. What if Dan Morgan was in there? I wouldn’t want to see him angry.
Smooth Operator: A 35-year-old woman filed a police report after receiving six suspicious phone calls throughout one night. She told police that during the first four calls, the suspect started breathing heavily and babbling with incomprehensible words. After telling the suspect she would call police, he called back twice, which she didn’t answer. You didn’t have to file a police report, OK? I just get very nervous when I call women. It’s a process.
Kids Gone Wild: Police were called to Beverly Woods Elementary School when one of the 10-year-old children assaulted another, causing minor injuries. I know fighting is all part of growing up, but when you’re getting police called to your elementary school and your age is barely double digits, well that’s just deserving of The Blotter. Your parents should be proud.
Please Leave: A 43-year-old woman called police when her husband made what can either be called a threat or a good decision, depending on which way he ended up going with it. The victim and suspect were arguing when the man told her, “I need to leave. I need to go to a hotel or someone is going to end up with a knife in their chest.” Seeing as how the wife was the only other one in the house, I wouldn’t blame her for putting up the room money and calling in a reservation for him.
Nice Try: A 63-year-old man called police when he realized that an apartment he rents out was broken into. The man visited the residence to find that the front door had been kicked in, causing damage to the doorframe. He told police this was all he was worried about, due to the fact that the apartment was empty at the time, and there was nothing to steal. No other damage was done to the property. You go through all that effort and get an empty apartment? Well, I’m sure you can skip your cardio for that day.
No Patience: A 40-year-old woman filed a report that her car was stolen after her boyfriend decided he didn’t need her to drive it. The woman told officers that her boyfriend was downstairs waiting for her while she was showering upstairs. When she came downstairs, her boyfriend was gone, along with her car. Any man who has ever waited on a woman to get ready can agree with me that this man did the right thing. I bet this woman never takes her sweet time again. Or maybe she will just insist on getting picked up.
Make A Decision: A 15-year-old male’s father filed a missing person report for his son after the boy ran away. The man told police that the boy has run away four times this year, and this time he did it because he was suspended from his high school for fighting. I’ve been suspended from high school, and I know that’s the best time to just kick it at the house and play video games. You’re ruining a nice vacation.
Effective Therapy: Officers were dispatched to an attempted suicide call involving a man on the Remount Road overpass of I-77. When officers arrived, he was standing at the railing and leaning over, but agreed immediately to back away and talk to officers. He told them he was not suicidal at all and stated he was only trying to figure out how to cope with some personal issues. I just have to know whether this guy yelled, “I’m king of the world!” while he was leaning over that railing. I’m still not sure how that will solve your problems, but to each his own.
Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department.
This article appears in May 12-19, 2009.
