Foxx vs. Cyrus: Do the right thing? 

Jamie Foxx came under fire last week for comments that he made about teen sensation Miley Cyrus. Cyrus, who is 16 years old, publicly lamented that alternative rock gurus Radiohead had all but ignored her backstage at the Grammys. She was excited about meeting the band. They and hip-hop artist Kanye West snubbed her and refused to meet her. Cyrus lashed out at them in the press saying, "I'm gonna ruin them. I'm going to tell everyone." Most people laughed, including Radiohead, at her sense of entitlement and her naiveté for believing that she could single-handedly bring down a group that is arguably the best alternative rock group ever with one fell swoop. Folks who care about and listen to Radiohead couldn't care less about the Disney rantings of Miley Cyrus, aka Hannah Montana.

This, of course, did not stop comedian/actor/singer Jamie Foxx from going where no grown man and father of a teen daughter should ever go -- verbally attacking a young girl who is obviously too young to know how silly she sounds. Her comments were silly and reflective of a child who has a sense of entitlement because she is wildly successful at a young age. Was she wrong? Yes, but was it worth the uproar? No.

When I first heard about Foxx's comments, which included he and members of his show calling her a "white bitch," telling her to make a sex tape, get a lesbian lover like Lohan, do heroin and crack like Britney Spears or get chlamydia from a bicycle seat, I thought to myself, "Funny, he didn't have anything to say when she was making fun of Asians."

My next thought was, "What kind of grown man, and father of a teen girl, would rail against a 16-year-old over something so silly?" Foxx eventually apologized, on Leno no less, stating that he was sincere. He blamed his behavior on being a "comedian" and "going a little too far." I thought that apologizing was the right thing to do because he did take it too far. He can go toe-to-to with grown women or young starlets like Lohan and Spears, who are both in their 20s -- but a teenager? That's hardly fair or correct. What I found to be interesting, however, is that so many people were appalled that he apologized.

This of course led me squarely back to what I've been writing about these last few weeks: Folks are so busy being right that they cannot fathom doing the right thing. Sometimes you have to fall on the sword, especially when you do something stupid. Going off on Miley Cyrus about Radiohead is stupid. Making denigrating and mean-spirited remarks (he made fun of her gums) is unacceptable; I don't care who it is. Grown men and women should not be picking fights with teenagers, ever.

I suspect if Billy Ray Cyrus had made comments like this toward Foxx's teen daughter, then it would have been different. People would have gone crazy if someone in his camp had called her a "black bitch," made fun of her looks, and wished harm on her, even under the guise of comedy. Rev. Al Sharpton and Rev. Jesse Jackson would have been leading the pack. Although they were suspiciously quiet when fellow Christian Burt Prelutsky asked if the White House got a female dog, would it be the First Bitch since Michelle Obama already lived there. He also called her a James Brown look-a-like, and when called on the carpet, rested on taking a "comedic Christian approach."

It sure is funny how people assign bad behavior to being a comedian. I know of many comedians who manage to get through a comedy set, talking much junk about everybody, but managing not to insult the audience. Besides, most comedy clubs only allow adults, so you know what you're in for when you get there. Jamie Foxx is funny -- no question. He took it too far in this instance because of her age and the setting. He admitted his mistake and publicly apologized. The apology may have had more to do with the fact that he has a new movie, The Soloist, coming out, but he apologized nonetheless.

Before the apology, his critics were calling for him to be fired. After the apology, his supporters were calling for him to "man up." Wow. He actually does the right thing and gets slammed for it, which speaks volumes about who we are. I heard on the radio someone say that he should never apologize to some child star. I'm thinking, "Why not, if he was wrong?"

Therein lies the problem: the inability and unwillingness for many people to admit when they are wrong. No one is perfect. We all make mistakes. We may hurt people unintentionally sometimes. Having integrity means knowing the difference between what is right and wrong, acknowledging when we are wrong and correcting it, which is what Foxx was attempting to do.

Instead of calling him names and acting incredulous, we should applaud the fact that he did apologize and move on. Real men and women accept responsibility for their actions and right their wrongs even if it may be to their detriment. It's called life. It's called being a grown-up, which is when you are more concerned with doing the right thing instead of being right. This applies to many parts of life -- whether it's a friendship, the workplace, church, a relationship or what have you. Not only should we give apologies, but accept them as well and be willing to face all of the positive and negative outcomes.

Nsenga K. Burton, Ph.D. is an assistant professor of communications and media studies at Goucher College and editorial director for RushmoreDrive.com.