But a recent column about S&M was so far off the mark that I think I’m going to have seek articles and fun to read things elsewhere.
According to the article:
Where once spanking, dirty talk, and hair-pulling pushed the limits of casual sexual encounters, choking, face-slapping and spitting are becoming more and more part and parcel of hooking up. What happens in the privacy of the bedroom is a matter of taste, I suppose, but in light of the recent, high profile Chris Brown/Rihanna scandal, you kinda can’t help but wonder whether harmless sex games and real-life violence toward women are connected.
Can you say apples to oranges. Domestic violence and S&M are not the same, not even on the same track. Partners who participate in S&M are both being pleased, the dom and the submissive. People actually get paid to flog people right here in Charlotte.
Real life violence toward women has more to do with the abuser’s mental state than someone playing a sex game. If it’s not your cup of tea, don’t do it, but use dime store psychology to explain domestic violence. It’s not true nor does it help victims of domestic violence.
This article appears in Mar 10-17, 2009.
Couldn’t agree more, Mustang Sally.
Most BDSM relationships include strict rules– even contracts– about where each person’s boundaries are and what is and is not acceptable.
It’s not everybody’s bag, sure. But, don’t judge my kink and I won’t judge your lack of spice. Dig?
In other words, let’s all stay out of each others bedrooms.
Amen! I thought that article was totally unfair. It’s as if the writer had a bone to pick with the lifestyle.
And I agree, we should stay out of each other’s bedrooms. But this is America where it is still illegal to have anal sex in some states.