Grand Theft Sex: The sex wasn’t good enough for a local woman. Her partner reported that after doing the nasty his lady friend left and stole his car.
Canadian Deceit: It was a 37-year-old woman’s lucky day, or so she thought: She was notified by mail that she won a Canadian lottery jackpot of $45,000. All she needed to do was send a money order of $2,800 to Freedom Lotto Inc in Alberta, Canada because that’s how lotteries work — you pay thousands of dollars before they pay you a few thousand more. Surprisingly, Freedom Lotto has yet to send her the jackpot cash.
I’ve Got Something Yummy in My Pants: A Food Lion clerk saw a teenager take three bags of candy and then disappear into the bathroom. When the young man returned from the loo, the clerk asked him where the candy went. The kid pulled the candy out of his pants and gave it to the clerk, who presumably put it back on the shelf.
Russian Cobra Hold: During an argument, not a professional wrestling match, a suspect picked up a table and smashed it over another person’s head. The victim had pawned some of the suspect’s stuff without asking permission.
The Horror: An inflatable Santa decoration was assassinated overnight. An autopsy revealed a BB gun pellet lodged in Nick’s deflated chest.
Finder’s Keepers: A visitor at someone’s home asked to use the restroom but did not really need to go. Instead he went into the victim’s room and stole $9,000 out of the garbage can. Trash raiding, no matter how lucrative, is not really a crime.
Threat of the Week: A woman received a phone call from a man who had just shattered the top of a glass table and smashed two flower pots on her porch. She was made aware of the damage via telephone from the destructor. He said: “I’m over here at your house tearing up your shit, bitch.” As the police report indicates: “The victim arrived home to discover that the suspect had indeed done just that.” So I guess a more appropriate title would be “Action of the Week.”
Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte Police Department.
This article appears in Dec 20-26, 2006.
