IF I HAD A HAMMER: A possible Pete Seeger fan took one of the singer’s songs quite seriously when he told someone: If I had a gun, I would shoot you in the head.
TOE TRUCK TERROR: A woman called medics to report an injury to a tow truck driver recently. After she wrecked her car earlier in the day, a tow truck came to her home in the afternoon to deliver her smashed up car. While the driver was operating the truck’s ramp controls, the truck began to roll backwards and stopped on his foot. The woman had to get in the truck and drive it off him.
COLD HEARTED CRIMINAL: A fight between two people at an apartment complex turned ugly when a man grabbed an ice pick and stabbed a woman in the chest with it.
THE QUICKER PICKER-UPPER: Tired of sitting and waiting for his car to be repaired at a local auto parts store, a man walked into the garage area and tried to speed up the process. He picked up a roll of paper towels and socked a mechanic in the face with it, bending the mechanic’s glasses slightly. Rumors of the mechanic finding even more problems with his car after the incident can’t be confirmed at this time.
QUOTE OF THE WEEK: If I do something to you, the police can only arrest me. Then I’ll be out on bond.
CAFFEINE ADDICT?: Severely maddened by a slight price increase in his usual Iced Mochafrappuccino Nut Latte Caffe Americano, a man damaged a wooden chair in a local coffee shop by smashing it against the floor. He was arrested for his behavior.
HONEY, I’M HOME!: A woman called police when an unknown person used a key to open the front door of her apartment while she was sitting in her living room. After she made some noise, however, the intruder was scared off.
CLEAN GETAWAY: While waiting for his car to be dried off at one of those hands-on car wash centers, a man hopped into his vehicle and sped off without paying for the service.
NOT HAVING A BLAST: A woman frantically called police to report a threatening message left on her machine. The message said: I’m going to blow up your house with you and your kids inside.
HAILING VICTORY: A man felt triumphant after his long cab ride when he positioned himself just right and kicked the cab’s meter off the dash. Luckily the driver had a good memory and knew the fee. Unluckily, the passenger fled the scene before police could arrive.
BIGGIE SIZED THEFT: A man drove up to a drive-thru at a local fast food restaurant, ordered a number two, and then biggie sized it. When he stopped at the pay window, however, he jumped out of his car, smacked open the cashier’s window with his fist, and stole the open cash register till, but then dropped the money till onto the ground. He had to speed off poor and hungry.
STICKS AND STONES: After smacking a woman hard in the face a few times, a man then kicked her in the nose and began to strangle her. After choking her for a few seconds, he stopped to tell her that if she didn’t do what she was told, he’d unfortunately have to beat her up.
Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte Police Department.
This article appears in Jan 7-13, 2004.
