Thursday, August 14, 2008

Please help me!

Posted By on Thu, Aug 14, 2008 at 3:48 PM

By Chinese gymnast Deng Linlin

Hello. I would like to take this opportunity to say that we Chinese gymnasts are exactly the same as you regular people.

Like you, as soon as we build up the muscles in our baby necks to support the weight of our heads, we are torn away from our parents and sent to a camp to learn double twists and front pike somersault dismounts.

To be honest, of late I've been questioning this. If all the people in the world were gymnasts, then who would till the fields, drive the buses, be loved and raised by parents?

Is love the right word? Does it mean "tolerate and commit an act of violence no more than once a day?" You must excuse my imprecise diction, only a few weeks ago was I permitted to use sentences that didn’t contain the words "uneven bars."

I'd also like to take this chance to deny the allegations that our team is under the legal age to compete. I ask you, does this look like the face of a girl under the age of 16?

Or how about this...

My apologies once again, that’s actually my training partner Li Yu. She’s 15 ½ and is very much looking forward to the London games in 2012.

Truth be told, I am unsure of my exact birth year. When my coaches take their midday feeding break, and we are ordered to spend the 20 minutes upside down in a handstand, I etch out each passing day on the ground under the floor exercise mat. As soon as they teach me how to count, I will be able to calculate my .

Sorry, I had to type the end of that sentence while on the vault.

I must say though, last night's victory made all the hard work worthwhile! I'm reminded of a popular fairy tale that was told to me repeatedly from a young age.

A pummel horse and a balance beam spend their entire lives getting ready to be equipment in a huge worldwide contest. They have trained very hard and have become the most sturdy equipment ever assembled! But on the day of the big competition a big earthquake hits and both crumble to the ground.

"But it is not my fault!" the pummel horse says.

"The ground was rattling so much it was physically impossible not to break!" says the balance beam.

However, it was their fault and they are taken to a junk yard and burned alive.

(help me)

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