Monday, February 16, 2009

How do you tell your mate about your STD?

Posted By on Mon, Feb 16, 2009 at 11:17 AM

You meet a great guy or girl and you two fall for each other. The conversation is great and the other person is an amazing kisser.

But you have a secret. You have a sexually transmitted disease. Though you and your new friend haven't had sex yet, the desire is building. But you're afraid the truth will push him or her away. Honestly, many people will walk away from you when they find out that you have an STD.

Opening up about having an STD (particularly the ones that are incurable, like HIV, genital herpes and HPV infection) can be downright frightening and a lot of people may be tempted to opt out of having the discussion altogether. You may even wonder if using safe sex practices may spare you from an embarrassing conversation with someone you're just getting to know.

It might, but if you really care about the person with whom you are considering having sex, you should tell them. It's not always possible to know with complete certainty when an STD is transmissible.

According to, timing is everything when you tell your partner that you have an STD.

Gather information on your STD, since your intended sexual partner may have questions. Your attitude and mood will influence how your disclosure is received, so broach the topic when you are relaxed and can devote your full attention to the conversation. Do it in a private place, but not en route to a romantic weekend. Nor should such a discussion happen in the midst of a passionate embrace. That's a mood killer and can lead to an angry response by your partner.

After telling the truth about your STD, you have to make sure you and your partner practice safe sex if that's the route you plan to take. Condoms are thinner now and there are cock ring vibrators that come with condoms to make safe sex more exciting.


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