Thursday, March 5, 2009

A lesson from a hot dog eater

Posted By on Thu, Mar 5, 2009 at 8:01 AM

click to enlarge hotdogmustard-300x297.jpg

My friend X and I went to the Charlotte Bobcats game this week and after watching the Bobcats beat the Chicago Bulls, we headed back to our car. Along the way X saw a hot dog stand and wanted to stop.

Of course, I didn't. I have no love for processed meat. We approached the stand, which was along Fifth Street and there was a couple in front of us. The man was watching his woman as she took her hot dog from the vendor. X nudged me.

"What?" I whispered.

"Do you see how he's watching her?"

"Umm, yeah, so? Maybe he wanted his hot dog first."

"Nope. He's thinking about what she's going to do to him when they get home. The way a woman eats a hot dog has a lot to do with how she gives head."

"Sort of like the banana test, huh?" I asked as I found myself drawn to looking at the woman chowing down on her dog. "How would you rate her?"

He smirked. "She seems to be all teeth."

"So, you think that's a look of fear on his face?" We both looked at the man and X nodded.

"He's been bit before." We laughed, but it got me to thinking. When you eat a hot dog you are supposed to be all teeth. I told X that after he got his dog and ate it in three bites. (He is greedy as hell.)

His response:

"You're a woman and you know when you all eat around us, you're trying to show off and entice us. I've seen girls make the ketchup and mustard drip down the side of the bun just to lick it off. They want to show what they can do with their tongue. The ones who get chili on their fingers and suck it off, they are the ones who make your dick hard."

Wow.

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