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The Blotter 

Crackers, Pepper Spray and Unlikely Weapons

Fire Sale: A woman looked out to her backyard and saw a man loading her firewood into a shopping cart. When she confronted the man, he began to yell at her. Perhaps he was unhappy with the quality of firewood he was stealing. The woman called police, who arrested the man a few blocks away on unrelated charges. Stealing firewood must be a gateway crime.

A Villain Trying To Get Superpowers: A Bluetooth earpiece valued at $99.99 was stolen from an Internet company. Should investigators find a suspect, it will now be considerably harder to sneak up on him.

Ritz or Wheat Thins?: A person threatened two women and a man by saying: "I hate you crackers. I'll shoot your cracker asses and pull your hair out." One of the threatened women was Hispanic.

Jalapeño Eyes: At a Mount Airy taqueria, a woman pepper-sprayed a 25-year-old employee in the face. While the injured man was tending to his burning eyeballs, the woman stole money out of his hand.

Don't Trust the Enfeebled: A 64-year-old woman reported a caned man used his walking implement as a weapon, pressing the stick against her neck.

Don't Trust the Dry: A woman filed a police report after being hit with an umbrella on the ankle. If you are a violent person or think you might turn violent due to the rain, please use a poncho.

Demerits: Just after lunch, a middle school called 911 to report a girl was being disruptive in the hallways by shouting and interrupting classes. Whatever happened to detention?

S'up?: At 4am, a man approached another man walking along Clanton Road and said, "What's up?" The greeter then grabbed the walker, who tried to run away but fell down. The greeter followed the walker to the ground where the greeter stabbed the walker in the leg and fled. The "walker" then became "the stab victim," and was treated for his wounds and released from a hospital. It does not appear the greeter really cared what was "up" with the walker.

Threat of the Week: A man phoned another man to say: "I'm going to choke your neck ..." CL thinks if you are going to choke someone, the neck is an excellent place to start.

Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte Police Department.

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