Thursday, May 7, 2009

Can women have sex like men? Experts say no.

Posted By on Thu, May 7, 2009 at 10:45 AM

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Men and women are different. We all know this, but when it comes to sex, I believe we're more alike than experts want to think.

I have too many friends who have given up trying to find Mr. Right and are willing to accept (notice I didn't say settle) Mr. Blow my Back Out.

Women want to come just as much as men do. However, since our pleasure parts are on the inside, we need a little help and sex toys can be a tad expensive. So, if a woman engages in a one-night stand, it doesn't mean she's going to fall in love with the guy or become Glenn Close from Fatal Attraction.

Seriously, experts, some women can have sex without getting emotionally attatched.

There's an article on the Marie Claire web site, that basically says women can't have casual sex. For some women, I think that maybe true. But all of us aren't trying to live out a fairy tale lifestyle that ends with "happily ever after."

Q: But if women don't want a relationship, shouldn't they be able to have no-strings-attached sex as easily as men?

A: They can. But just because they can doesn't mean they should. The way chemicals are released in the brain during intercourse is very different in men and women. In women, oxytocin is released. It's a chemical that makes women want to nurture their young and stay close. Men get a huge jolt of testosterone, which suppresses oxytocin, and that's nature's way of saying, "Leave the nest and go sire offspring somewhere else." So when women think they can have sex and walk away just like guys do, they're having to suppress thousands of years of evolution that tells them to cuddle, stay in bed, and look forward to tomorrow. When they get up and walk out, they feel depressed and don't know why.

Here's the thing, science aside, sometimes you don't want to stay and cuddle, you want to push him out of the bed and take a shower. If a woman has knowledge of herself, she knows what she's getting into when she drops her lacy underwear.

Women have learned, or at least I hope, that an orgasm isn't love. So, why can't we sow our wild oats for a while without everyone telling us that we're going to be depressed sluts? And why is there a new article about this topic every week on many web sites and on the cover of women's magazines?

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