Thursday, March 24, 2011

Jenny Craig's boyfriend

Posted By on Thu, Mar 24, 2011 at 1:05 PM

Your self-help books tell you he's not that into you. Your friends tell you "don't do it man" when you're considering asking her to marry you. Your father refuses his blessing, and your mom thinks she's the cutest thing ever.

Guy or girl, when it comes to dating advice — who are you supposed to listen to?

How about a seemingly perfect stranger with a blog ... and an unbiased opinion. I offer great advice, I just never heave my own ... and then go out and make a lot of mistakes you can learn from. Got issues (who doesn't)? Drop a line to brittney.cason@creativeloafing.com with the subject line: "The Blind Leading the Blind."

Dear Brittney,

My girlfriend is starting to gain weight. It's so bad I'm not really attracted to her anymore. Not just her body, but her attitude about it. She doesn't ever want to work out and always wants to go out to eat and she orders fried food!! I know it's reversible, but how do I tell her I think she needs to lose weight without freaking her out or hurting her feelings?

Signed,

Jenny Craig's boyfriend

Dear Jenny Craig's boyfriend,

Very wise of you to proceed with caution. If you breach the subject of her weight with comments like "Are you really going to eat that?" then you're just going to end up on the other end of her finger being the ridiculed source of her insecurity. She should want to lose weight for herself and her health — not to appease you. And you need to trick her into thinking that's the intent (and if you truly love her, then that should actually be your sincere intent ... just saying). Start planning some outdoor activities together where exercise is a side effect. Go to the grocery store and stock the fridge with lean meats and veggies. Sugarcoat the truth (using no calorie artificial sweetener). Suggest that you want to get into shape for the summer and ask her if she wants to be your diet and exercise buddy — like girls do with each other. As long as you don't force her on the scale and give her a math problem. Chances could be that she doesn't even realize she's gaining weight. Is she stress eating? ... are you stressing her out, Mr. Jenny Craig? Did you knock her up? Consider there might be a logical reason to this weight gain. If not, and it's just pure laziness, then light a fire under her ass. Speak now, or forever hold your piece of cake. Here's the alternative ...

09-fat-girl-1

Love, Brittney

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