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Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Random Dumb Sh*t Anti-Valentine's Day gifts

Posted By on Wed, Feb 13, 2008 at 3:26 PM

Via Cracked.com, we found a list of V-day gifts that won't be on sale in Wal-Mart on Friday. Mainly because they kinda suck as tokens of love, but rock as tokens of laughter and possibly tokens of tokes. It's the list of Gifts That Won't Get You Laid.

A couple of our favorites?

The Single Shot Garder

single_shot_garter.jpg

Quoted as: "Here's a gift that has some honesty behind it. The garter says, 'Hey baby, I wanna see you in your underwear' and the flask says ,'But you're gonna need to be drunk for this to work.'"

The Personalized Novel

personalized_novel.jpg

Quoted as: "Why settle for chocolate or flowers on Valentine's Day when you can immortalize that special someone as a complete fucking tool for all time? Pirates of Desire is a romance novel you can personalize by having them rename characters after you and that special person -- you can even include your cat! This is sure to make for the most awkward reading of your lives, as your girl realizes how badly she wants a swashbuckling adventurer with an eight-inch dick, instead of the pudgy Halo enthusiast who thought paying someone to use the 'Replace All' function on their word processor counted as a thoughtful gift."

See the complete list here.

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