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Thursday, August 27, 2009
Mingling in the Queen City Me, myself and I
Posted By Shameika René on Thu, Aug 27, 2009 at 12:35 PM
It seems despite my best efforts to fend off the spreading of bitchassness, it’s just never enough. Instead, that disease just continues to run rampant through the community just like Diddy said. Today's example is the recurring updates on social networking sites that have caught my attention.
In layman's terms, it's best broken down like this:
Relationship drama = the "woe is me" syndrome.
What you mean Meik?
I'm glad you asked. The "woe is me" syndrome is just another symptom of the bitchassness virus that attacks the very thing that keeps us moving from day to day: The Self Esteem.
Let me break this down for you so we are all on the same page.
Contrary to belief, I too have had my share of relationship drama. I view relationships just like the roller coaster rides at an amusement park. When you first get on the ride, it's full of excitement, then you ride that wave for a while, then you climb higher and higher and higher, until you reach the peak of happiness and you coast. Then all of a sudden a sharp angle sends you flying right back downhill into the abyss of whatever is waiting. From that point, its up to you to make the choice to get off the damn ride, or stay on the mofo and continue to have to deal with bullshit.
Here's where the "woe is me" syndrome comes into play. Once you've decided to hang in there and be that ride or die mofo until the wheels fall off, your world is shattered and you hear the most dreaded words ever, " We need to talk. I think we need to spend time apart." Or, you may hear this, "It's not you, it's me, I just need some space to find myself." Or my personal favorite is just don't tell a mofo ish and drop off the face of the earth and leave them standing there holding their heart in their hand (wait...I had a flashback; but I'm back).
Whatever the conversation may be, the end result is the same: RELATIONSHIP IS OVER. RIDE ABORTED. Get your shit and go.
Now what I'm seeing on the networking sites, is people of all ages trying to either garner sympathy or perhaps draw the ex back in, or they may just be fool, but again, it's the same message: "woe is me, nobody loves me, nobody wants me, etc, etc, blah, blah."
Don't get me wrong, I'm not the completely heartless because I've been there. This clearly boils down to a self-esteem issue.
My advice? (Don't get it twisted, this is still my blog so even if you don't wanna hear it I'm giving it out anyway).
At some point, you have to take that dreaded walk and look in the mirror and take a good long hard look at the person you see. If you see a person with their hair outta control, eyes bloodshot red, nose snotty, and just overall Tasmanian Devil type ish, then Houston, we have a problem.
I've always been told, never let another person control how you feel, meaning don't let someone else's faults be the reason for your drop in self-esteem level. Imagine the horror of having your self-esteem drop to a -0! I'm clutching my pearls at the thought!
Just like Katt Williams once said (and I’m so paraphrasing so don't get your panties in a bunch), self esteem is just that: Esteem of your damn self. You can't blame others for something you should have under control because its all yours! Nobody else’s. YOURS! Get it? SELF=YOURS!
So, take another look in that mirror, dig deep and find the good things about yourself and build from there. If you can't find anything, then damm it, look again. Because you just aren't trying hard enough!
Check that bitchassness at the door and don't let it in, and if some of it seeps in stomp it like a roach and throw that ish in the trash. The "woe is me" syndrome ain't a bit cute and it damn sure won't have mofos running in your direction.
Just like mama always said, "You have to love yourself first, before you can expect someone else to."
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