Remember when you and your friends would stay out all night, drinking, talking shit and flirting with everything that had a pulse?

Or remember when you and your friends gathered around the movie screen to watch a chick flick, eat popcorn and cry because men are such dogs?

Well, according to the Frisky, if you're getting married, those days are over.

And this is the biggest load of crap I've ever heard.

Yes, the all night parties are over when you say 'I do.' But not your friendships. Everyone isn't going to get married at the same time, so guess what, you're going to have single friends.

Here's what I've learned from some happily married people, you can't live in a vacuum. The world is not just you and your spouse. The hubby should still have a guy's night and the wife should still have a girl's night.

Time apart makes the time together even better.

This right here, is just ridiculous:

Life was filled with wine-drenched, late-night talks, long bike rides along the lake, picnics in the park, afternoon shopping frenzies, potlucks, brunches, and impromptu sleep-overs — all with my single friends. Now that I’m fully immersed in “coupled life,” I realize I’ll probably never have friendships like those again.

If you're never going to have friendships like that again, then you probably weren't a good friend to begin with. More than likely, you did all the bitching and complaining and your friends had to listen to that bullshit.

One reader of the blog said it best:

As [a] single girl this all sounds so self-absorbed.  “When you’re married you’ll find out who will take a red-eye to be with you in a crisis”????  It’s like high school all over again.  You find the husband, dump your girlfriends when marriage is fun then complain that we aren’t there for you when marriage becomes real because you ignored us.

We singles aren’t morons.  We realize that your marriage will always come first, but throw us a bone and don’t treat us like an employee you call only when there’s a crisis to tend to. We truly are happy for our married friends, as like as they’re not married to jerks).

That's right!

Men and women are different. We all know this, but when it comes to sex, I believe we're more alike than experts want to think.

I have too many friends who have given up trying to find Mr. Right and are willing to accept (notice I didn't say settle) Mr. Blow my Back Out.

Women want to come just as much as men do. However, since our pleasure parts are on the inside, we need a little help and sex toys can be a tad expensive. So, if a woman engages in a one-night stand, it doesn't mean she's going to fall in love with the guy or become Glenn Close from Fatal Attraction.

Seriously, experts, some women can have sex without getting emotionally attatched.

There's an article on the Marie Claire web site, that basically says women can't have casual sex. For some women, I think that maybe true. But all of us aren't trying to live out a fairy tale lifestyle that ends with "happily ever after."

Q: But if women don't want a relationship, shouldn't they be able to have no-strings-attached sex as easily as men?

A: They can. But just because they can doesn't mean they should. The way chemicals are released in the brain during intercourse is very different in men and women. In women, oxytocin is released. It's a chemical that makes women want to nurture their young and stay close. Men get a huge jolt of testosterone, which suppresses oxytocin, and that's nature's way of saying, "Leave the nest and go sire offspring somewhere else." So when women think they can have sex and walk away just like guys do, they're having to suppress thousands of years of evolution that tells them to cuddle, stay in bed, and look forward to tomorrow. When they get up and walk out, they feel depressed and don't know why.

Here's the thing, science aside, sometimes you don't want to stay and cuddle, you want to push him out of the bed and take a shower. If a woman has knowledge of herself, she knows what she's getting into when she drops her lacy underwear.

Women have learned, or at least I hope, that an orgasm isn't love. So, why can't we sow our wild oats for a while without everyone telling us that we're going to be depressed sluts? And why is there a new article about this topic every week on many web sites and on the cover of women's magazines?

They say a hard man is good to find.

Last night, that slogan was proven to be wrong, according to my lovelorn friend she and her man ran into the problem last night of his body being ready, but his just couldn't perform.

She said he's had a long week at work and they'd gone out to dinner. She could tell that he was tired, but she was horny. And they'd had tired sex before. Not last night.

They kissed, but she could tell he wanted to yawn. She felt that sweet throbbing between her thighs when he pressed against her and she reached inside his pants, stroking his hard dick.

By the time they'd gotten naked and into bed, her man was only good for a few pumps and then he was knocked out. But his dick was still hard. No matter what she tried, she couldn't wake him up.

It was about 2 a.m. before she noticed that he'd gone soft. All she could think was, what a waste.

If you can barely afford to pay your bills, can you really afford outside booty? Can you buy gifts for your spouse and your other woman/man?

According to the Boston Herald, no.

Professional snoops say they suspect some would-be philanderers may be too cheap to cheat, while indignant spouses are forced to swallow their pride rather than push confrontations that could lead to an expensive divorce.

And who wants be with a married person who can't give them anything? You might as well date a broke single man. I wonder if cheating sites like Ashley Madison are taking a hit?

And does this mean that when the recession ends that people will begin cheating again or are the tough times making marriages strong?

Yesterday I received a text message from my niece. She said that she'd broken up with her boyfriend but don't worry, she'd found a new one.

That was quick, I typed back to her. She said no, I've known him for a while and I can tell you everything that I like about him.

The first thing she said she liked about him was the fact that when he talks to her, he keeps his eyes on her face. Her ex, she said, did nothing to look at her breasts.

The new boyfriend told her that her face is pretty enough, he doesn't have to look anywhere else.

But more importantly, he agrees with her decision to wait for sex. In an age where young girls are having sex at 13 and 14, hearing that my niece is willing to wait and isn't going to let some young boy pressure her into having sex, did my heart good.

However, the main lesson here is that if a 16 year old can meet a boy who is respectful and nice, is there any reason why adult women should settle for assholes?

I've figured out one thing about my best friend. She's crazy. In. Love.

Accent on the crazy part.

I knew she was crazy but it was confirmed today when my phone rang as I sipped my morning tea and she said, "I love his morning breath."

"What in the hell?"

"This morning when we woke up, he just leaned in and kissed me."

"Gross and germ infested."

"I know," says my hypochondriac friend who doesn't shake hands. "But it was organic and natural. I loved it."

"Well, I just lost my appetite. Can you please stop being so crazy in love, Beyonce Jr."

She then launches into a 15 minute story of how she never felt this way before. But I was still stuck on kissing with morning breath. I've been in love before--although it seems like a lifetime ago--and I have never kissed with morning breath. Especially if the previous night included, alcohol, onions, cigarettes or meat, because the morning breath is truly horrible.

Do you kiss before brushing or rinsing? And if you do--does it mean you really love the person you're kissing or are you holding your nose?

I think morning breath is crunchy and that is not a good thing.