The Tool Academy of Charlotte ... bad boys with bad pick-up lines | Brittney Cason After Dark

Monday, June 22, 2009

The Tool Academy of Charlotte ... bad boys with bad pick-up lines

Posted By on Mon, Jun 22, 2009 at 3:38 PM

I’ve come to the conclusion that being single these days is like the state of the current economy – but with all these new places opening throughout Charlotte, come new faces.

But it doesn’t really matter where you go – you’re going to meet people there, some of which will be tools trying to nail you with bad pick up lines.

Like these...

One night at Cans, I made the mistake of wearing my Jessica Simpson’s Butterscotch lickable body lotion and a guy just walked up to me and took a bite out of my shoulder and told me I smelled like pancakes and made him hungry.

At the Sunset Club, this guy just threw his arm around my waist and pulled me close to him. Like he was fishing and I was an unsuspecting goldfish or something. I wiggled my way free and he looked shocked, “Do you not know who I am?” he asked.

“Am I supposed to?”

“Be gone,” he told me. “You’ll find out by the end of the night.”

I still have no idea who that guy was, other than a guy with seriously bad game. But I’m sure there are girls out there who fall for that... don’t be that girl, or guy for that matter.

According to the book “The Game” by Neil Strauss, the most successful method of picking up women is to insult them and scrutinize their insecurities. A “neg” will not only get their attention, but possibly them. Because the good guy always finishes last, after all. Why is that ladies?... and how can we make it stop? But sometimes great people pop up in the most unsuspecting places. I met the last guy I dated that didn’t suck while judging a bikini contest at Whisky River.

I used to think that I was flypaper for tools, but I've come to the conclusion that it's only the tools with overinflated egos that use those pick-up lines. But if you're out looking for a tool - look no further, there will be one at Forum on Wednesday night ... as if there weren't enough tools in Charlotte as is, we had one shipped in.

tool-academy.jpg

But as for the economy, I have a theory…. if Brittney Spears can make a come back, well, so can the economy.

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