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Bizarre crime from Charlotte police files (June 16) 

Growing pains

Shots Fired When operating a large, marijuana-growing operation in your home, it's best to keep a low profile and act, well, responsible, at least in public. Last week, a man threw a temper tantrum while in traffic in southeast Charlotte that not only put a woman's life in danger but also led to the discovery of the man's illegal horticulture business. Police say a woman was driving on Idlewild Road when the man driving in front of her stopped his car abruptly, got out of the vehicle and started yelling at her. When she attempted to drive around him, he allegedly took a gun out of his car and fired a shot at her vehicle. The bullet struck the car but she was unharmed. She pulled over after driving a safe distance and called police. While police were speaking with the woman, the suspect drove by and she pointed out his vehicle. Police pulled the man over and the woman positively identified him. Police later searched the man's home and found 15 marijuana plants, each at least two feet tall. They estimated the value of the weed growing in the home to be $30,000.

Caffeine Jolt A woman in a north Charlotte Starbucks took a grande to the face for a certain wake-me-up when she ran into her ex-boyfriend's new lady last week. The woman reportedly threw her cup of coffee onto the victim during an argument that started in the store. She reported that the coffee soaked her dress and she sustained injuries from the temperature of the drink. In an unrelated incident, a gas station clerk called the police when a customer threw a cup of soda on her after he became angry about paying for a refill. There's no such thing as a free soda, bud.

Maxing and Relaxing Lately we've been reporting that people have been breaking into apartments and houses to complete daily tasks like cooking and cleaning. Continuing in that trend, a man in the University area reported this week that an unknown suspect entered his bedroom and spent some time not doing chores but just hanging out. Police reported that the suspects "appeared to have moved his clothing, sat on his bed and used his bathroom."

News Watch The revolution will not be televised, unless the revolutionaries gain control of the airwaves. WJZY Fox46 News filed a report after a $15,000 piece of broadcasting equipment was stolen. A reporter told police that a backpack containing the device was placed on the ground during a live broadcast and while they were on air someone picked it up and walked off. So much for watchdog journalism.

Drive 'n' Dash Two suspects put the pedal to the metal in a small shoplifting spree at an auto parts store in east Charlotte. The store reports that a man was attempting to pay for his selection of brake rotors and lug nuts when he gave the old, cliché excuse that many of his ex-girlfriends had probably heard before on dates: he "forgot" his wallet. Instead of putting the items back, he ran out of the store with them. His friend was waiting in the getaway car outside (it's almost like he knew about the wallet) and they fled the scene.

Solvent One woman left her apartment in Charlotte after getting sick of listening to her neighbors argue. When she returned the next day, she discovered a rock had been inexplicably thrown through her window. She said that she can't think of any reason why anyone would vandalize her home. The police report states that "there are no solvability factors for this case," which is police lingo for "We give up."

Kicked Out School staff going through state-mandated training got more than they bargained for last week when a student lost his shit in front of the entire administration. Police were called after a kid reportedly started kicking walls in the office and shouting obscenities. The report states that he was a disruption to the training session, but real-life scenarios can really help turn the sweetest teachers into disciplinarians. Tackle that kid!

Hereditary Police had to be called to Thomasboro Academy after calling parents in to fix a situation between students only made things worse. Two students were exchanging "hateful verbal remarks" on the bus and the bus driver turned the bus around and brought them back to school. The students were brought to the office where parents were called. According to the report, "one conversation was civil and the other parent became enraged to the point where staff and secretary felt threatened." The enraged parent reportedly became confrontational and used racial remarks toward staff members before being told he could not return to the school. To this, the parent replied that he would removing his children from the school anyway, and presumably taking them somewhere that doesn't frown upon hateful language.

Threat of the Week A suspect sent vulgar and terrifying messages to a man in Plaza Midwood last week. Among the nasty things said was "I'll ship you back in pieces to Augusta, motherfucker." No word on who's going to pay for shipping.

Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department. All suspects are innocent until proven guilty.

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