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The Blotter: Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow 

Bizarre crime from Charlotte police files

Bad Hair Day Police responded to a pharmacy in west Charlotte last week after a desperate man took desperate measures to improve his appearance. According to employees at a CVS on Wilkinson Boulevard, a suspect walked into the store at about 5:10 p.m. one day and stole eight boxes of the hair regrowth treatment Rogaine. The question now is this: Do you look for a bald suspect or one with brand-new hair?

Bottle Service Police cracked down on one man's local business after he was found to be violating a plethora of liquor laws during a recent Panthers game day. The entrepreneur was found to be running his own personal ABC store on the side of East Morehead Street near Uptown. When police confronted him, they found 135 mini bottles of liquor, made up mostly of Finlandia Vodka and Jack Daniels. Police confiscated all of the man's bottles, despite the fact that he was doing every tailgater in Charlotte that day a service. Not all heroes wear capes.

Secret's Out It's a pretty common occurrence for folks to pull grab 'n' go shoplifting runs at Victoria's Secret, but one suspect leveled up recently, getting away with what might be a Blotter record worth of underwear. The suspect ran out of a Victoria's Secret at SouthPark Mall with nearly $5,000 worth of merchandise, including 257 pairs of panties, 20 pairs of pajama pants and 26 bras.

Loaded Two suspects in south Charlotte decided to take a more tactful approach to their shoplifting last week, steadily increasing their bounty throughout the day while ignoring any demands that they pay for what they were drinking. Employees at a QuikTrip convenience store told police that the duo came into the store multiple times between 2 and 10:30 p.m. on a recent Saturday, each time snagging some beer. They weren't just stealing tallboys, either. The report states that the pair made off with an 18-pack of Bud Light, a 24-pack of Bud Light, a 24-pack of Corona, a 12-pack of Corona and an 18-pack of Heineken. It's a wonder they were able to walk by 10:30 p.m.

Increditable A 30-year-old Fort Mill woman filed a report with CMPD recently after her attempts to boost her credit score were unsuccessful. The woman told officers that her friend recommended somebody who could help her increase her credit score back in March. She met the suspect at a Circle K, the sure sign of a legit operation, and gave him $425. Surprisingly, she reported that in the seven months since, the suspect has not done anything to help her with her credit score.

Hot Mess One woman should probably consider staying away from the mini bar for a while after she was literally dragged kicking and screaming from the Aloft hotel near the Epicentre on a recent Sunday night. The "appreciably impaired" suspect was escorted out of the building by police, who reported that she pulled away from them multiple times while screaming curse words. She then upped the ante by kicking one of the police officers, and was eventually charged with assaulting a police officer, resisting arrest and intoxicated and disruptive behavior.

Shots Fired More epic fails in Uptown hotels, as a 49-year-old Oxford man will not soon forget his recent excursion to Charlotte, which ended with a trip to the hospital. The man told police he had placed his Cobalt handgun in a bag with his clothes, and when he got into his room at the Hampton Inn he threw the bag onto the ground, at which time the gun fired and struck him. The man was hospitalized for a gunshot wound, although it was listed as just a minor injury on the report.

Destroyer A 39-year-old northwest Charlotte man woke up one recent morning to find that someone had done some serious damage to his car — damage that went beyond your average vandalism report. The man told police that some unknown suspect did $2,500 worth of damage to his 2018 Honda Civic by slashing all four tires, smashing the windshield and denting the hood and doors with a bat. The man said he isn't sure whether the suspect ever tried to enter the car, but that's sort of beyond the point. Whatever the vandal's intentions, it's safe to say the victim pissed someone off pretty thoroughly.

Responsible Father Police responded to the Mecklenburg County Child Support office last week after a man threw a hissy fit when told that he would have to continue to to pay for the child that he brought into this world. The man went to the office to see if he could get his monthly child support payment reduced, and when he was told it would not be reduced, he went into a rage, kicking a trash can and throwing a chair into the wall, doing $100 in damage. Just put it on his tab.

Changed My Mind A similarly cheap man — possibly the same man — was at the center of a dispute at Leather & Lace strip club in north Charlotte recently. Police responded to the club just after 1 a.m. in response to reports that a man allegedly enjoyed the fruits of $280 worth of private dances, then decided after the fact that he no longer wanted to pay for them.

All stories are pulled from police reports at CMPD headquarters. Suspects are innocent until proven guilty.

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