CL Undressed Carolinas

Have you ever had a thing for those well endowed next naked ladies you find on the front of sea boats. These “figureheads” as they were known, were meant to guide sailor’s home safely, but they were often the source of a lot of upper deck jerk sessions.

Today we bring you a position that is designed to bring those fantasies to life:

This position begins with the man seated in a chair. The woman then sits on his lap facing away from him and leans forward just enough to reach behind her and grab his shoulders or upper arms for support.

Pulling her legs behind her, she can now allow herself to drape elegantly forward in the classic figurehead position. Sails ahoy!

On a scale of 1 to 10 how would you rate position (1 as horrible, 10 as sexual nirvana)?

This position gets a 7.5 for form and a 6 for function.

Did you have difficulty getting into the position?

No, this position is quite self explanatory once you start messing around with it. While it may take a few minutes to get everything set up and working, there is nothing too tricky.

Did you feel like a pretzel?

Were you able to do the motions once in position? No. The motions are kind of a 'make-it-up-on-your-own-as-you-go-along' kind of thing.

Any recommendations on getting either in or out of this position?

You won't need them.

How long did you last in the position?

10-12 minutes

Enjoyment once you were in position (for the woman):

She felt this position offered some stimulation. A whole lot of it... no. But enough to get the juices flowing... yes!

Enjoyment once you were in position (for the man):

The view of this position is quite enjoyable for those who love nude art/photography. The way her back and neck arch, bosoms hang, hair drapes... it is a rather elegant pose to behold. The stimulation itself... well, not so great!

Short Answers:

Was the position comfortable?

Were you able to relax?

Man: Quite comfortable and relaxing.

Woman: I was surprised to hear that this position was actually quite comfortable. It provided a good stretch, and made her feel beautiful.Would you consider this to be an intimate position (Why or why not)?

Yes and no. The position itself is a bit distant. You can't read her facial expressions, hear her sighs, or touch each other as readily as other positions allow. However, with the use of a mirror that can all change.Are you achy or sore after the fact?

Woman: NoWhat did the position feel like (both mentally and physically) in 50 words or less?

Most of us have an artistic side to our sexuality. This position was less about the slam and the bam and more about appreciating the figure and form of my partner. There is something about this position that brings out the Romeo, who is usually held down by the Ozzy Osbourne.Did she reach orgasm? …No

Did it take longer than usual to reach orgasm? N/AWould you do this position again (why or why not)?

Every once in awhile a position comes out whose soul purpose is just to see if you can do it. While not a traditional position, this one does promise some good tales around the bar stool.

This position begins with the man in a handstand with his hands on the floor and torso leaning up against the bed (facing the bed). The woman then sits on the edge of the bed with her legs wrapped around his waist.

Now it is up to the woman to help her partner achieve penetration while in this very compromising position. Once penetration is achieved, both partners can wrap their legs around each other for support and wiggle n' gyrate.

On a scale of 1 to 10 how would you rate position (1 as horrible, 10 as sexual nirvana)? 

6.5

Did you have difficulty getting into the position?  Yes, this position takes balance, coordination, and communication to achieve penetration. If you are lucky to get this far, it will take even more communication to figure out how to achieve any stimulation. This is a two part puzzle.

Did you feel like a pretzel? Were you able to do the motions once in position?  Yes, this position messes with your head as you are not only upside down, but turned 'bassackwards'.

Any recommendations on getting either in or out of this position:  Nope... that is all part of the experience. Actually, it is the entire experience!

How long did you last in the position?  5 minutes

Enjoyment once you were in position (for the woman):  There was not a huge enjoyment factor on her behalf. The penetration was shallow, the movement limit... and the view from her angle wasn't so great either.

Enjoyment once you were in position (for the man):  Not much enjoyment here either. There is a brief moment of excitement once your in position, but it quickly dwindles once you realize there's not much more to it.

Short Answers

Was the position comfortable? Were you able to relax?

Man:  Hell no, this position isn't comfortable. And since I am not particularly comfortable with my bare ass being stared at, I was subconscious of this situation the whole time.

Woman:  She just sat there looking rather distant, perhaps there was a sort of relaxation going on there, but I would more appropriately classify this as boredom, and there is little the guy can do to liven things up.

Would you consider this to be an intimate position (Why or why not)?  No, this position is as far removed as masturbating in two separate rooms, grunting and moaning to each other through two cans of tomato sauce tied between a rope. This is the definition of angry sex... heaven forbid if the man has had a bean burrito within the past day or two.

Are you achy or sore after the fact?

Man:  No

Woman:  No

What did the position feel like (both mentally and physically) in 50 words or less?  This position felt awkward, cold, uncomfortable, distant, and unsatisfying as a whole, but there is a brief moment of pride that comes with its initial accomplishment. This is sex for sport... not pleasure!

Did she reach orgasm?  …No

Did he reach orgasm?  ...No

Did it take longer than usual to reach orgasm?  N/A

Would you do this position again (why or why not)?  No... once you've been there and done that you won't want to go again. It's kind of like the movie Titanic... once you know the ending, there is no reason to go back and experience it again.

Any suggestions to make the position more pleasurable:  Try it once, then twirl yourself around and do it the normal way!

The flexibility and balance that Yoga offers can be utilized in many Kama Sutra positions, and the one we are about to introduce to you today is no different. Namaste's Delight begins with the woman on her back and the man standing above her head.

The woman then takes her legs and swings them over her head until her knees are resting on the floor along side her ears. She should be curled up in a nice round ball with her “yoni” blossoming directly in front on the man to his  great delight.

The man can now enter her and commence to making love with a feverish frenzy of humps and hoots.

On a scale of 1 to 10 how would you rate position (1 as horrible, 10 as sexual nirvana)? 

8.5, this is truly a beautiful position.

Did you have difficulty getting into the position?  No... with a little flexing on her part, she was able to curve around to this position without too much trouble. The only requirement for the guy is to be in good enough shape to at least hold his own weight while standing.

Did you feel like a pretzel? Were you able to do the motions once in position?  Yes, this position does make one feel like you are in a pretzel, but the motions are none-the-less quite easy to accomplish.

Any recommendations on getting either in or out of this position:  She is going to have to be flexible, or you are going to end up with a partial ball, which isn't quite as much fun and the penetration isn't as deep. If she hasn't stretched like this in awhile, don't go into it cold, let her warm up a bit before you commence with the fun.

How long did you last in the position?  12 minutes.

Enjoyment once you were in position (for the woman):  She did find the angle and depth of penetration very enjoyable. Her only complaint was of the view... my A$$. But you can't win them all.

Enjoyment once you were in position (for the man):  This position gets me horny just thinking about it.

Short Answers

Was the position comfortable? Were you able to relax?

Man:  This position is quite comfortable and relaxing for the man.

Woman:  No, this position is not particularly comfortable for the woman unless she has some yoga/gymnastic background

Would you consider this to be an intimate position (Why or why not)?  Oh yeah, she is going to get an eye full that only a proctologist could appreciate. Seriously though, this is an intimate position that allows you both to explore up close and person some of those “parts” that are sometime not as convenient to get hold of. But a word of warning, the sight of a “sh!# ball” can really break the mood, so clean your rears good before you get started.

Are you achy or sore after the fact?

Man:  No

Woman:  No

What did the position feel like (both mentally and physically) in 50 words or less?  If you are an butt and thigh man, this position will treat you to her entire rear end and you can stare at it the entire time without getting any dirty looks from her. She'll be too busy staring at your own ass, err trying to ignore it. The angle of penetration not only makes your partner moan, which is very enjoyable to thine ears, but it also makes her seem as tight as a fresh virgin to your Johnny (or close to it anyway).

Did she reach orgasm?  …Yes.

Did he reach orgasm?  ...Yes

Did it take longer than usual to reach orgasm?  No

Would you do this position again (why or why not)?  Yes, this one of those gems that shakes thing up in the bedroom and gives sex a whole new perspective. The standard positions are all quite boring once you really start to incorporate Kama Sutra positions such as this into your daily playtime!

Any suggestions to make the position more pleasurable:  I said it before and I'll say it one more time... wash that A$$!

There are many uses for a good solid chair and sex is probably the most fun that you will ever have with one. The trick to chair sex is to look beyond the standard “sit on me” and “bend over” positions.

The parrot begins with the woman doing what we have all been told not to countless of times by our parents. Sitting on top of the back of the chair with her feet on the seat.

With the man standing behind her holding her waist for support, she is then instructed to slide down the back of the chair until only the back of her knees are hooked around the top and her bum is hanging freely.

The man can now proceed with penetration, which may require him to lean the chair back slightly. This is a balancing act of sorts, but if you get it set just right it actually requires little strength.

On a scale of 1 to 10 how would you rate position (1 as horrible, 10 as sexual nirvana)? 

9.5... yup, the most fun you'll have with a chair!

Did you have difficulty getting into the position?  No. As long as you are using a good solid wooden chair, there should be no problem.

Did you feel like a pretzel? Were you able to do the motions once in position?  No, and the motions all came quite simply

Any recommendations on getting either in or out of this position:  Well, obviously as soon as she slides down the back she is going to begin to fall back, so this will be a test of the trust in your relationship. Missing her would sure be funny, but the next couple of weeks masturbating alone wouldn't be!

How long did you last in the position?  15 minutes.

Enjoyment once you were in position (for the woman):  Yes, this position was a definite turn on for her and the different angle got me into some hard to reach spots that she seemed to really enjoy.

Enjoyment once you were in position (for the man):  The view is beautiful and the action can be as wild or tame as you like it. This position is all the man. She can't rock back and forth and mess up your rhythm as they sometimes do with the regular dog. She is on a rack with nowhere to go but wherever you want her to. It doesn't get much better than this!

Short Answers

Was the position comfortable? Were you able to relax?

Man:  This position is incredibly comfortable. If you get a good balance on the chair, it actually takes very little effort to keep this one going.

Woman:  At first it is fairly comfortable, but it won't last forever. Eventually the chair will start to dig in the back of her knees and put her feet to sleep.

Would you consider this to be an intimate position (Why or why not)?  This position lends itself to the man becoming a pleasure hog for his own gratification, but if your partner gets off on that kind of thing, it will be a big turn on for her too. There isn't much partnership or communication going on here, so the guy may have to do a little cuddle time in exchange...

Are you achy or sore after the fact?

Man:  No

Woman:  No

What did the position feel like (both mentally and physically) in 50 words or less?  This position is very raw and crude. It separates the touchy-feely stuff and gets straight down to the sex. Having her balanced on a chair makes it easy to pull her onto you, which also makes for some intense pounding sessions. This is a real treat for the guy who likes a$$.

Did she reach orgasm?  …Yes, two.

Did he reach orgasm?  ...Yes

Did it take longer than usual to reach orgasm?  No

Would you do this position again (why or why not)?  Yes, we would most certainly do this position again. While it is certainly not something you would do too often, it breaks up the usual standard positions and gives you options in several other areas of the house you may not have thought of before.

Any suggestions to make the position more pleasurable:  Make sure the chair is sturdy. We found this out the hard way!