According to meat processors in North Carolina, if you're against puppy mills and keeping dogs chained up 24/7, then you're a vegan fanatic who's trying to ban the eating of meat. And you thought people were freaked out about swine flu. Well, yes, they are, but they're not the only ones. In fact, it seems to be a newly revived national habit, particularly for folks on the right. Conservatives aren't merely concerned about President Obama's left-leaning policies, they're freaked out about the U.S. going socialist — hell, communist! — and black helicopters coming in the dead of night to steal their guns and tinfoil hats. Their paranoia and sheer unhinge-itude may have to take second place, however, to the N.C. meat producers, who are virulently opposed to a bill pushed by the national Humane Society that would regulate and license commercial dog breeding, and crack down on puppy mills. They're also going nuts over a bill which, if passed, would prohibit keeping a dog chained up for more than nine hours a day. Reaction from the meat-packing companies? Kay Johnson, executive VP of the Animal Agriculture Alliance, a livestock industry lobbying group, says, "... the Humane Society of the United States has a very direct agenda to eliminate the use of animals for food. Nobody would have steak, hamburger, eggs — everyone would have a vegan diet." And no, this is not a joke. In fact, Peter Daniel of the NC Farm Bureau adds to the insanity by saying that since the Humane Society launched a successful campaign in California to give farm animals more room to move in their surroundings, they must be planning the same thing here — a charge denied by a puzzled Humane Society spokesperson. What brought on this pandemic of paranoia and deluded nonsense? Get this — the Humane Society has hired one lobbyist to work for it in the NC legislature. One whole lobbyist! That's what they're freaking out about. The question that comes to my mind is how meat producers and their spokespersons expect anyone to take what they say seriously, after making such outlandish, not to say lunatic, leaps of illogic.
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