I can't be the only music writer in the country who doesn't watch American Idol. I mean, I'm familiar. I know the people from the show who've gone on to success outside of it, but, being completely honest, I haven't seen more than 30 seconds of it live since maybe season 2 and you know what? I'm good with that. But every now and then someone will ask me if I saw the last episode then try to explain to me what I'm missing.
This happened again last night. In the middle of a crowded club, a grown ass man, tried to describe to me one of the contestants' physical build. Now, the guy telling was big in the stereotypical club bouncer, rapper security guard way but his enthusiasm for the show made me feel like at under six foot, I could probably take him.
I mean he was hyped. Talking with his hands and all these gestures, I'm sure from across the room it looked like he was telling the greatest story ever, but alas, he was not. After sensing that I had little to no interest in this, presumably after I said, "Man, I haven't watched that show since the Fantasia and Ruben days," he reaches for every married man's excuse for watching Idol, Oxygen or WE, "you know my wife be watching that stuff."
Really? Your wife's the one making you text votes every week? Sure, pal.
The funny thing is, if he actually described someone's singing ability, I may have went home and checked it out, something crazy like "Pants On The Ground" happening again, sure, I'd YouTube that but really, I have to see this guy's neck? I'll pass on that Idol moment.