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Thursday, October 22, 2009
Pep in your step Sex that all couples need
Posted By Mustang Sally, Mayor of Bang Town on Thu, Oct 22, 2009 at 5:49 PM
If you've been with your mate for a while, your sex life probably needs a makeover.
This article from YourTango.com is the first step.
Sexual experimentation is key for keeping a long-term relationship fresh, fun and fulfilling. Opening up about your desires can also bring you and your partner closer together. "Experimenting with each other requires a willingness to be vulnerable, which improves intimacy," says Mort Fertel, Baltimore marriage counselor and creator of the Marriage Fitness Program.
The best type of sex on the list is the "hope we don't get caught" sex. You remember being young and sneaking into the basement of your parents' house to get a piece from your boyfriend or girlfriend. While you were stroking, you were also listening for those tale-tale footsteps that belonged to mom or dad.
That made the sex so much more exciting and risky. It's just as fun as an adult. And if you're dating someone with kids, you're probably well versed in the sneaky sex act.
Oral sex without getting caught, now that is the height of excitement. Though it's a lot easier for a woman to give oral sex to her man than the other way around.
This weekend is the best time to try it. After all, it's supposed to be raining.
Mingling in the Queen City You might be a 'jumpoff' if ...
Posted By Shameika René on Thu, Oct 22, 2009 at 4:26 PM
With the tragic death of NFL great Steve McNair not too long ago, many questions, comments, eyerolls, and folks looking at their own boo pieces with the side eye have come up.
McNair's mistake, as with many, was cheating — and not screening that heffa, but I digress.
Some of you may even be questioning, "Where do I stand with my own mofo in my life?"
Don't you worry. I'm here to help.
Let's take a closer look at the definition of a "jumpoff."
A jumpoff is NOT the main boo, and is just around for sexual purposes.
I think that about sums it up.
Now let's run down my list of ways to figure out if you indeed are JUST THE JUMPOFF:
1. You have low self-esteem (or maybe you haven't figured out that you do), but yet you think you're doing big ish. Lemme explain: You think just because you might get a water bill paid, or even your gas tank filled, and if you're real good, you might get a trip thrown in there. Bottom line is you THINK you are big ish poppin' cuz wifey/hubby ain't doing their job. ***side eye*** Allow me to inform you of something: Wifey/hubby is always gonna be numero uno ... you will always come towards the bottom of the list. But if you like it, hey, do you boo.
2. You only have the cell number. I'm just saying if you were the main boo boo, you'd have all the numbers ... right? I mean, the house number, work number, any other dang number that exists. And if you get a sec, take a peek in his/her cell; you'll probably find tons of other jumpoff's numbers in there.
3. You only get a call every now and then, when the main boo is acting up. Meaning, you might get a call, maybe three to four times a month.
4. If you've heard this bullshit line "I'm waiting on the right time to tell my wife/hubby about us." Riiiiiiiiight. And I'm Michael Jackson's love child.
5. If you never go anywhere together in public, like cute little dates such as dinner and the movies, or wine tastings. The only places you see are the ceiling, the bed, floor, shower, elevator, kitchen table, or wherever you handle your business. Hmm chances are ... you are the jumpoff.
Now, a successful jumpoff NEVER has any expectations. It is just about the sex . There are no gifts, trips, bills being paid, none of that — just sex. A jumpoff never asks questions, doesn't stalk other potential jumpoffs, and probably has enough jumpoffs of their own so they aren't worried about any of 'em.
Lesson Learned: If you fall into all of the categories mentioned, and you are OK with being in that role and have no intention of taking things further, then hooray for you. You win the "successful jumpoff award." BUT if you fall into the categories mentioned, and you have hopes and dreams of moving up to wifey/hubby status, then you might need to take the scissors and cut off the chain this mofo has you dangling from and move on. Love and respect yourself and realize that you deserve to be happy and maybe this person just isn't the one for you.
Today’s Top(less) 5 Today's Top(less) 5: Thursday
Posted By Mustang Sally, Mayor of Bang Town on Thu, Oct 22, 2009 at 7:05 AM
Here are the five best events to get you hot and bothered with or without a date going down in Charlotte and the surrounding area today, October 22, 2009 — as selected by the folks at Creative Loafing.
• Champagne Thursday at Club Onyx.
• Thumpin Thursday at Scorpios.
• Lady styling Salsa lessons.
• Rocking The River at Whisky River.
• Table side dances at The Gentleman's Club.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Today’s Top(less) 5 Today's Top(less) 5: Wednesday
Posted By Mustang Sally, Mayor of Bang Town on Wed, Oct 21, 2009 at 6:30 AM
Here are the five best events to get you hot and bothered with or without a date going down in Charlotte and the surrounding area today, October 21, 2009 — as selected by the folks at Creative Loafing.
• No cover at Club Onyx.
• Champagne dinner at The Fig House.
• All you can eat at The Men's Club.
• Ladies Night Line Dancing at Coyote Joe's.
• Wet Wednesday at Leather and Lace Southend.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Hard News NC Highway Patrol seems to be the sexiest job in the state
Posted By Mustang Sally, Mayor of Bang Town on Tue, Oct 20, 2009 at 3:32 PM
Sex in cop cars.
Sex with wives while husbands watch.
This isn't a sampling of Pornhub videos, it's what's going on in the North Carolina Highway Patrol office.
I'm all for a man in uniform. Hell, that's a major turn on, but State Troopers are out of control with all of these allegations of sex on duty.
Then today, it's reported that the new leader of the highway patrol had his own sex scandal in 1987, while he was a trooper.
New State Highway Patrol Commander Randy Glover took the job with a pledge to police the troopers' ethics. As recently as last month he told them they need to be "morally and ethically beyond reproach."Glover didn't disclose until Monday that he too had failed to live up to the patrol's standards. He confirmed in an interview that in June 1987, the patrol transferred him out of his Harnett County assignment to another post 120 miles away because he had an extramarital affair.
OK, sign me up. I want to be a state trooper.
It seems that only on this job can you do something like this:
In June, for example, the patrol dismissed Sgt. Timothy White for unbecoming conduct after finding he had a sexual encounter with the wife of a master trooper in the back seat of a car after a Christmas party. The master trooper was in the front seat at the time; White has filed an appeal to get his job back.
And, according to the News and Observer out of Raleigh, on duty sex has been considered by many troopers as " an expected fringe benefit."
Here I thought coming to work and writing about sex all day was a good thing. The Highway Patrol is having sex.
I'm fucking jealous.
Interviews Sex Q&A: Erotica writer Rachel Kramer Bussel
Posted By Mustang Sally, Mayor of Bang Town on Tue, Oct 20, 2009 at 12:47 PM
When the book Bottoms Up: Spanking good stories came across my desk, I was super curious. Of course, by the title you know it's about spanking ... but what about spanking?
Rachel Kramer Bussel edited the tome, which contains 20 short stories about spanking. The stories range from funny to thought-provoking. While they all have an erotic theme to them, not every stories has explicit sex. It's a great read. Creative Loafing spoke with Kramer Bussel about the book and found out this isn't the first booty-smacking anthology she's been a part of.
Creative Loafing: Why stories about spanking?
Kramer Bussel: It's something that I've been interested in for a while. It's a fun topic, it's not as intimidating as some other S&M activities. There is room for playfulness and I think it's something that when you say spanking, people immediately know what it is. It's something that's popular and people are curious about.
Do you hope the stories in this book will inspire people to try spanking?
I don't feel like I have an agenda, that I want more people to try spanking. But I do think it's something that a lot of people are curious about and a book of erotica is different from a 'how-to-book' and I think it can be a good way into the topic -- whether it's reading it by yourself or with a lover. I hope that the kind of experiences in the book are realistic enough that people might say, 'I may be interested in trying that.' I think it's something that people can read and say, can I put myself in the character's position. I hope that it's sort of a way to say that all sorts of people are interested in spanking.
How did you choose the stories that were in the book? What was it about these stories that kept the idea of spanking fresh?
It can be challenging, especially because you know going into it that all of the stories are about spanking. I really try to emphasize thinking creative, make it interesting and different. Because you don't just want [stories about] 'you've been a bad girl, I'm going to take you over my knee.' You want something that's in some way surprising.
Some of the stand-out stories in the book are:
"A Thousand Words" by Donna George Storey
"Sorority Sister" by Dominique Dunbar
"The Spanking Machine" by Rachel Kramer Bussel
"Flaming" by Jean Roberta
Today'sTop(less) 5: Tuesday
Posted By Mustang Sally, Mayor of Bang Town on Tue, Oct 20, 2009 at 6:30 AM
Here are the five best events to get you hot and bothered with or without a date going down in Charlotte and the surrounding area today, October 20, 2009 — as selected by the folks at Creative Loafing.
• Grapes and Hops at Earth Fare.
• Tune Up Tuesday at Whisky River.
• South of The Border Tuesday at Uptown Cabaret.
• Half off admission to MAL Clubs.
• Watch guys in shorts play with balls.
Monday, October 19, 2009
He said/She said Farting is never cute, in front of your guy — that could be the end
Posted By Mustang Sally, Mayor of Bang Town on Mon, Oct 19, 2009 at 11:15 AM
This morning, I read an article on Your Tango.com asking if you fart in front of your guy.
Eww!
Some women have the right idea, don't fart in front of the man. It's not about being a perfect lady, but farting is nasty and it stinks. We're not talking about "queefing," which is hot and possibly why Kanye West is with Amber Rose. But I digress.
Farting in public is nasty, I don't care how long you two have been a couple. And neither does this lady's husband.
Take Cynthia, who, even after 18 years of marriage, says that publicly passing gas is a no-go."This is a major issue for my husband, who gets very upset if I pass gas in his presence," she says. "He finds it a vulgar romance killer. If the need arises, I am to leave the room, walk away if outdoors, or get out of bed and leave the bedroom. We were walking home from my birthday dinner and one kind of happened and he barely spoke to me for a day."
Amen brother! And it goes for men as well, especially after you've chowed down on game day food and have stomach full of undigested meat and gas.
If you're dating a guy who thinks it's a bonding experience for you two to have farting contests, please check your age and his because that's more than nasty, that's juvenile.
Terena and her husband of 12 years have even turned their gas into a bonding experience of sorts. "At first I was shy to fart around him, but as time went on I had to relax or explode," she says. "We both laughed about it, so gas just turned into an inside joke for us. We now have competitions over farts. Who has the loudest, or longest, or smelliest ... we add categories as they come up."
What are they 12?
Today’s Top(less) 5 Today's Top(less) 5: Monday
Posted By Mustang Sally, Mayor of Bang Town on Mon, Oct 19, 2009 at 8:21 AM
Here are the five best events to get you hot and bothered with or without a date going down in Charlotte and the surrounding area today, October 19, 2009 — as selected by the folks at Creative Loafing.
• Howl at The Moon at The Crazy Horse Showclub.
• Monday night football at The Uptown Cabaret.
• Find Your Muse at The Evening Muse.
• So You Think You Can Dance at Time Warner Arena.
• Chubby Karaoke at Dixie's Tavern.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Homecoming/reunion hook up: is it worth it?
Posted By Mustang Sally, Mayor of Bang Town on Fri, Oct 16, 2009 at 11:12 AM
As you think back to high school or college, there was probably one person who you wished you'd stepped to and at least gotten a drunken hook up with.
Fast forward ten years and it's time to see that person again. That's right, it's reunion and homecoming time. Over the last decade, you've done pretty well for yourself. You've either gotten a good job, broken out of whatever clique you were in and lost or gain some weight.
You've grown up and you've gotten confident. You know what to say to the opposite sex and how to get your flirt on. And you don't give a damn if the jocks or mean girls talk about you behind your back.
Still, you wonder if that guy or girl that you were crushing on is single or even worth all the time that you spent thinking about them in high school or college. Then they walk into the venue and as luck would have it, the last ten years have been good to them. They're still smoking hot as you remembered. He or she is single/divorced/widowed or otherwise unattached. You're single --even if it is just for the weekend.
Is it now time for you to find out what you've been missing?
While your loins may say yes and your crush may be willing, you could be making a huge mistake.
1.) What if it doesn't live up to the decade long fantasy you've built up in your head? The disappointment will kill you, not literally, but you get what I'm saying.
2.) What if you do have someone in your present life and somehow they find out about you reunion/homecoming hook-up? Are you willing to risk your present just because you had to dip back into the past?
3.) It could be the best sex ever to you, but your old crush may be bored as hell. Then you're never going to see this person again and that's going to lead to many more years of wondering what's next in this decade old one-sided love affair.
4.) Your crush could end up being a stalker. While they may have been stable in high school or college, who knows what kind of freaky shit happened to him or her in the last ten years? You could have comforted them in a way that's going to make them move to your current town and plant him/herself at your feet and make you love them when all you really wanted was a romp.
So before you step to that old crush, weigh the pros and cons and check yourself, because you could be the crazy one.
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