... was actually in October this year. (It’s usually in September despite the fact it’s called Oktoberfest, but that’s neither here nor there.)
Not only did one of Charlotte’s biggest (and drunkest) festivals change months, but locations as well. This year the massive beer sampling went back to the Metrolina Expo rather than Memorial Stadium. As a result, it had more of a county fair feel than the Renaissance tailgate one Memorial Stadium provided.
Oktoberfest celebrates the culture of drinking with 350 beers on tap from different brewers. They give you a shot pint glass and you go sampling like Saturday at Costco.
And with a lot of drinking, came a lot of peeing. While I was standing in line to break my seal in the outdoor restrooms, all along the woods surrounding the beer tents were guys watering the bushes. At that moment, I decided that I wish I were a guy. Not only would I be better at football and exempt from makeup and menstruation, but I could avoid porta-potties all together, let alone the lines for them — guys can just whip it out and instant bladder relief.
Guys tend to have a higher alcohol tolerance than women as well. I can’t give you an accurate report of the different beers, because I was tipsy off of one brewery’s sample assortment, and they all began tasting the same after that. But I can tell you my personal favorite was the pumpkin ale, — it’s kinda like the Halloween egg nog.
Men can also pull off the "T-shirt-and-jeans" look easier than women. The T-shirts were an attraction in itself – I saw shirts reading “I heart boxed wine,” “The liver is evil and must be punished,” “I’ll tap that” (with a picture of a keg), and “Six pack abs” (with a picture of a six pack of beer spread out like ab muscles). Men even had bibs to wear that made them look like German beer girls. Oh but there were some actual beer girls there as well.
The only bad thing about Oktoberfest is the commute to it … unless you are not drinking, why would you drive to a beer festival? I get that alcohol clouds your judgment, but you have no excuse when you make the sober decision to drive there. Clearly, there will be check points.
I saw a sign at the Expo entrance that read:
Cost of getting a cab … $20
Cost of DUI … $10,000
Cost of not spending the night in jail … priceless (actually it was more like a $40 cab ride to Uptown, but its still a bargain compared to a DUI).
Oktoberfest did more than just harm the sold out crowd's livers, it helped out other people. Proceeds to Oktoberfest went to AA ... not really. Oktoberfest raised $25,000 for Victory Junction Gang and A Hole in the Wall Camp. Cheers to that!
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