Thursday, September 27, 2007

Bill O'Reilly is Such a Normal Bigot

Posted By on Thu, Sep 27, 2007 at 3:56 PM

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by Al Sharpton

I can't believe how completely normal Bill O'Reilly was at our dinner last week. He was exactly the same as every other white bigot I've ever broken bread with.

He showed up to the Harlem eatery out of breath, a mixture of sweat and tears running down his face. A look of bemused terror clung to him, similar to what an ant must feel when you spray his home with a Super Soaker 150 and his world, previously so safe and moundy, becomes suddenly deluged with water, terror and floating carcases of his little ant friends.

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Retro Horror Flick Series

Posted By on Thu, Sep 27, 2007 at 2:51 PM

The Ballantyne Village Theatre recently announced the lineup for its latest retro series, which will lead up to Halloween with a series of classic horror films. The titles are as follows:

Sept. 28: Plan 9 from Outer Space

Oct. 5: Donnie Darko

Oct. 12: Nosferatu (the silent version)

Oct. 19: Evil Dead II

Oct. 26: TBA

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Tickets cost $5 (general) and $7 (reserved). For more info, call 704-369-5101 or go to www.bvtheatre.com.

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Tuesday, September 25, 2007

This Week's Filmtastic Photos

Posted By on Tue, Sep 25, 2007 at 12:08 PM

Here are some more photos from the movies film critic Matt Brunson reviewed in this week's issue.

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FBI intelligence analyst Adam Leavitt (Jason Bateman) fights off kidnappers in The Kingdom.

(Photo by Frank Connor)

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Monday, September 24, 2007

Hillary's Health Care

Posted By on Mon, Sep 24, 2007 at 11:53 AM

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— Cartoon by Jim Hunt

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Thursday, September 20, 2007

Jena 6 Cookout

Posted By on Thu, Sep 20, 2007 at 8:04 PM

Action Center for Justice and Charlotte Energy Solutions have planned events this Saturday for supporters of the Jena 6.

There will be a cookout at Charlotte Energy Solutions, guest speakers and a showing of the documentary Passin' It On.

Here's more info, courtesy of an e-mail from the Action Center for Justice's David Dixon:

Please bring something to throw on the grill, your favorite beverage, and family and friends. (We will have some hotdogs & hamburgers to get started.)

Donations will be accepted for local organizing for the Sept. 29 March on Washington & future events.

All supporters of Jena 6 welcome, no one turned away for lack of money.

Invited guests include:

Rev. James Barnett, The Crusade, Stop The Killing

Ahmad Daniels, Director, Creative-Interchange & reparations activist

Sylvia Grier, Vice-President, Millions More Movement – Charlotte

Jibril Hough, Chairman, Islamic Political Party of America

Cook-Out starts at 5:30 p.m.

Guest speakers at 7:00 p.m.

Film starts at 8:30 p.m.

Charlotte Energy Solutions

337 Baldwin Ave

Charlotte, N.C. 28204

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Destiny, Thy Name is George Clooney

Posted By on Thu, Sep 20, 2007 at 9:31 AM

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By Brad Pitt

If you are reading this, I may already be dead. It’s been two days since I began running for my life from George Clooney. I haven’t showered or brushed my teeth in over a day. I feel disgusting. I told my driver to keep us moving. We stop only for pee breaks, lattes and the occasional promotional appearances for my new movie Jesse James and the blah blah long title.

I tried to convince Angie that she and the boys, or whatever we have now, aren’t safe and that they needed to come with me, but she says I’m being paranoid and to just come home. She promised to let me watch as much Fat March as I want to and that she’d show me her boobies, but even brilliant television and amazing boobies can’t keep me safe from George.

Do you have any idea how horrible it is to have your best friend want to kill you? I guess I’ll never have the chance to give him his half of the BFF (best friends forever) heart necklace I got for us when I was in Paris.

OH MY GOD, WHAT WAS THAT!?

Oh my god, we just hit a small dog, but I thought it was George shooting at us. The driver wanted to stop to check on the animal, but it could have been a trap. George could have thrown that puppy in the street just so we’d hit him, stop and get out of the car. Then BAMMO! He snaps my neck and cuts my driver’s ears off.

My only option is to keep driving. Maybe drive until I find one of those martial art monks who can teach me to kill by making me catch flies with chopsticks or punching walls. Only then will I be able to face my destiny which goes by the name George Clooney.

Please tell Angie and our kids that I love them and that our work in movies hasn’t been in vain.

News Groper features more than 50 parody blogs by politicians, celebrities, business tycoons, and foreign despots.

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Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Fest Winners

Posted By on Wed, Sep 19, 2007 at 3:11 PM

The 15 Short Film Festival was held this past Sunday at the Evening Muse. Twenty movies were shown, and awards were given to the following:

Jury Prizes:

Drama: The Shade (Iran/Canada)

Comedy: My Mum the Wrestler (UK)

Documentary: Nubian Queen Lo-La (USA)

Animation: Puppet (USA)

Experimental: Between You and Me (USA)

Audience Award:

50 Cents (Netherlands)

My favorites?

Drama: The Shade (Iran/Canada)

Comedy: My Mum the Wrestler (UK)

Documentary: Bowl Digger (USA; actually, the only entry from North Carolina)

Animation: NNoise (Hungary)

Experimental: 50 Cents (Netherlands)

If any of these shorts turn up again in the Queen City in other local film fests, be sure to check ‘em out!

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Monday, September 17, 2007

NoDa, No Duh

Posted By on Mon, Sep 17, 2007 at 1:41 PM

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— Cartoon by Jim Hunt

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Friday, September 14, 2007

Foo Fighters to Play Charlotte

Posted By on Fri, Sep 14, 2007 at 4:11 PM

The Foo Fighters will play Cricket Arena on Oct. 5 in support of their upcoming release, Echos, Silence, Patience & Grace.

Tickets go on sale on Sept. 21 at 10 a.m.

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Another Reason to Like Jack Black ...

Posted By on Fri, Sep 14, 2007 at 3:10 PM

Jack Black was the guest for David Letterman's Top 10 list recently: "Top Ten Things you Don't Want to Hear at a Music Store."

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