To avoid graduating from the pricy Duke University with debt, a freshman has taken to staring in adult films. To no one's surprised, she's experienced a fair share of slut shaming since a student revealed her identity.

• Duke University Archives (flickr)

I'm not going to look for her true identity - that's neither here nor there. But I will share her blog post and a few hopefully thought-provoking questions:

Would this be as big a deal if she went to, oh, I dunno, NYU?

If a male freshman at Duke was doing porn, would he turn into frat bait, too?

She says she wants her privacy protected, but she performs in public in the most revealing way. Is she really, as she says, "not ashamed of porn"?

An Internet troll argued she was too young to know what she was getting into. If the girl is smart enough to get into Duke, is it safe to assume she's capable enough of navigating her formative years?

Good news, South Carolina. You finally beat us at something! On average, you all watch porn for 11 minutes and 17 seconds, 9 seconds longer than North Carolinians.

But wait, I come bearing more good news! MILFs, today is your lucky day (when is it not?). North Carolinians search yours more than any other term - including, but not limited to, bi, teen, straight, gay, teacher, secretary, bi-racial, mature, lesbian, blowjob, bukkake, college, fetish, hardcore, red head, shemale, threesome, uniform, vintage, babe and ass - on PornHub.com.

• Kyle MacDonald (Flickr: Creative Commons)

Yesterday, we gave away a bunch of foodie-type books, found on our office shelves by yours truly. Today, the book giveaway focuses on steamy romance novels, all recommended by the erotic fiction writer Zane herself. After all, she published them.

One reader gets to take all 11 books home. All you have to do is drop us a comment below: Share with us a paragraph of your own personal erotic novel. No critics here: Just good, dirty fun.

We'll pick the entry that makes us the most hot and bothered. (Make sure to include the correct email when you sign in to comment that's how we'll be getting in touch.)

**Must be able to come by CL's offices at the N.C. Music Factory to pick up books between the hours of 9 a.m.-5 p.m. during the week.

Many believe that 2012 is the year of Armageddon. The Mayan calendar ends in December, there are rumors of a zombie apocalypse bubbling on the East coast due to a string of flesh-eating incidents, and there are hourly hillbilly threats of bloody revolution if Obama gets re-elected in trailer parks all over the southeast.

I agree that we are on a path to destruction this year, but not because of fanatical politics, zombies or solar flares. No, no. I believe that the imminent demise of the human race will prove to be a direct result of the 50 Shades of Grey book trilogy by author and probable antichrist E.L. James.

50 Shades is the story of ingénue Anastasia Steele, a college student who is the personification of the moth, aware but tragically drawn to the flame - the flame being one Christian Grey. Christian is a wildly attractive and successful entrepreneur. A billionaire before the age of 30, he has serious stalker tendencies, deep-seated mommy issues and a dark need to be in complete control of everyone and everything. As a result of this personality cocktail, Christian is a self-proclaimed sadist who contractually takes women with physical likenesses to his crack whore biological mother as his submissives , thus allowing him the liberty to beat the hell out of them with various objects, tie them up in what sound like highly uncomfortable positions, and "fuck them" senseless.

Not immediately alarming or terribly far removed from the loose plot of many low budget pornographic films, right?

The content of 50 Shades isn't a call for Jihad or the vehicle to inexplicable death within seven days of exposure, like the VHS from The Ring, but the side effects from ingesting this text are far more hazardous than anyone could have imagined. These books are the nuclear bomb of our generation. This entirely new brand of evil should not be taken lightly.

One night a friend and I were hanging out at a bar, perusing Facebook (because that's what you do apparently while out for the night). We stumbled upon a graphic that read, "Describe your sex life using a movie title." Without thinking, I blurted out The Fast and The Furious and immediately my dude friend was dying of laughter.

It is seriously an understatement when I say he and I went back and forth for about an hour with witty movie titles that could be dirty in so many ways. It's like the fortune cookie game: Add "in bed" to the end of every fortune you find in a fortune cookie and you're guaranteed a chuckle.

So in honor of passing along the fun and hours of hilarity to you, I've asked dozens of people to describe their sex life using a movie title.

Here are their most hilarious responses:

Here are their responses:

KR: "Gone in 60 Seconds"

AB: "Any Given Sunday"

AB: "Mission Impossible"

Lately, you can’t turn around without hearing in the media of some new assail on women. Conservatives want to arrogate our birth control, enforce policies surrounding the abortion process, shame us, and generally remove our ability to have firm indisputable say in our reproductive choices. Oh, and no pleasure fucking.

Although I’m not completely sure where the archaic regression is stemming from, I expect it’s a culmination of quiet conspiracies amongst middle-aged to gray-haired conservative white men to “get back to the good ole days,” over the past 30 years. You know, the days when women focused on cupcakes, not futures.

I’ve always thought that if we can contain this kind of absurdity to that particular demographic, that we will ultimately prevail in the evolution of equality and fairness. After all, misogynistic white guys are a dying breed, right? They will eventually all die off from disproportionate consumption of red meat and pain pills, right? Nope. The frightening truth is that they are growing and harvesting a whole new army of chauvinistic minions, waiting hungrily to take the reins when they kick the bucket.

My ultimate, and truly bizarre realization of this came in the most unlikely of places. I was out rejoicing my partial Irish-ness on St. Patrick’s Day when it happened. A young, 23- to 25-year-old guy confidently walked up to me and pretend masturbated onto my leg, and then pretend threw it into my face. Yes, you read it correctly, and it’s appropriate to laugh … it’s that ridiculous. He made both stroking and ejaculating hand motions, full out, with conviction and facials to boot. Then he pointed to his friends, who were watching in approval, then joined them for a victory celebration.

Now typically I would have launched into a very loud and impassioned Julia from Designing Women style monologue, but no words came, due to what I can only assume was total shock. I simply stumbled over to him and asked if that had actually just happened, to which he affirmed and then shared credit for his brilliance with his friends. All I could muster in response was “Holy shit.”

Let’s be clear: I am not easily offended, nor do I take things personally on the regular. I am a young, obviously liberal of mind female who works in the banking/financial industry. I punch my card to the boys club daily. My skin may as well be laminated, so much rolls off without effect. But there are boundaries that are self-explanatory, and I’m fairly certain that publicly jizzing on a stranger is one of them. That’s bold.

It is truly terrifying to think that a whole new generation is buying into the garbage being peddled by the current ranks of right-winged He-man woman haters. Even Spanky and the other Rascals realized their wrongs and allowed girls into the club in the end. Why can’t some grown men get a clue and figure out appropriate behavior? I can only fear and dread what may be around the corner if these kinds of things continue to get a pass. Victoria’s Secret will start selling PINK chastity belts so that girls can stay pure for their future husbands, and we’ll all have to invest in stylish helmets to avoid getting clubbed and drug from the bar.

It's hard to find a job these days, but if you can work a pole or serve up a mean drink then Club Onyx is looking for you.

All new hires, (dancers) will receive a $200 house credit through the month of April.

So, how do you apply for a job at a strip club? You don't need a "written" resume —  just show up between 7 p.m. and 11 p.m., Sunday-Saturday.

When a sexual assault happens, the victim needs more than just a police officer to take his or her statement and capture his or her assailant.

That person needs a strong shoulder to lean on, and United Family Services wants you to provide that shoulder.

The group is looking for volunteers to serve as rape crisis companions. United Family Services’ volunteer coordinator Joey Honeycutt said rape crisis companions man the 24-hour rape crisis hotline, which UFS operates.

“A rape crisis companion is a volunteer who provides crisis counseling and support and information and referral services to victims of sexual assault who contact the hotline, as well as hospital accompaniment to the victims,” she said.

To become a rape crisis companion, Honeycutt said a person must go through training.

“We have a 30-hour comprehensive training,” she said. And starting next week, training begins for a new set of volunteers. “It’s three Wednesday night sessions that are two hours and three Saturday sessions that are eight hours. The training focuses on the basics of rape and sexual assault. Victim experience, basic crisis counseling, legal and medical procedures that sort of thing.”

While Honeycutt said that it takes at least 30 people to man the hotline to ensure that all shifts are covered, the more people who want to sign up, the better.

“No number would be too many,” she said. “We tell our volunteers, once they’ve completed training to commit to a minimum of one year of service, signing up for two 12-hour shifts per month of covering the hotline.

Right now, Honeycutt said there are 26 rape crisis companions covering the hotline.

Volunteers must have access to a phone, their own transportation and get to the hospital when called in at least 30 minutes, though Honeycutt said there is some flexibility with that if a person lives further away from a hospital.

UFS will hold its next Rape Crisis Companion training in the Cabarrus County office on May 12, 15, 19, 22, 26, and 29. Wednesday night training sessions will take place from 6:30 p.m. to 8:30 p.m., and Saturday sessions will take place from 8:30 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. Training is comprehensive, so trainees must attend all sessions.

The training sessions are open to individuals in Mecklenburg County who are interested in providing support and resources to victims of rape and sexual assault through the agency’s rape crisis hotline and hospital accompaniment. The agency also needs male Rape Crisis Companions to work with male sexual assault victims and Companions who speak Spanish.

To sign up for the training, contact United Family Services’ Volunteer Coordinator Joey Honeycutt at: 704-367-2734 or jhoneycutt@ufsclt.org for an application.

Although I'd like to think that not having sex will ruin your life--trust me, with an orgasm and a cup of coffee I am a bitch.

But according to Cracked.com, there are five REAL, yet bizarre, sexual conditions that can ruin your life.

Yes, ruin your life.

Imagine walking around with an erection that won't go away. That's priapism and the reason that Viagra and other drugs like it come with the four hour erection warning.

The problem with priapism is that nothing can bring your little soldier down from attention. Even when you've had your fun, he's still saluting. Doesn't sound so bad except that, when you're hard all the time it's the result of blood pumping in to the wang but not out. This can lead to blood clots, gangrene and the future inability to ever have an erection again. Oh, and pain. Severe pain.

And then there is sexomnia. It's like sleep walking but it involves fucking.

Aside from not remembering the amazing sex you had, you don't get to pick your partner, which can lead to some rather embarrassing morning after moments.

But the scariest one and the one that's going to send me and someone else I know to the doctor's office this week is: PSAS, permanent sexual arousal syndrome.

When we say you're turned on all the time, we mean to the point that at the drop of a hat, you have an orgasm. The phone rings? Orgasm. White socks today? Orgasm. Caught your parents having sex? Goddamnit, orgasm.