I, like most women, love vibrators.

I, like most women, don't really think about when these glorious items were invented or why.

But I am somewhat of a nerd, and I like to know how and why things work. Thank you playwright Sarah Ruhl.

She wrote In The Next Room, or the vibrator play" and it's on stage in New York right now. The Broadway drama, which I have not seen but read about in Friday's New York Times, is about how women discovered the pleasure of stimulation down there.

Set in the 1880s, just after the advent of electricity, “In the Next Room” takes place in the adjoining parlor and consulting room of an upstanding physician, Dr. Givings (Michael Cerveris), who specializes in treating “hysteria” in women. A new patient, Mrs. Daldry (Maria Dizzia), exhibits all the disturbing symptoms of the condition. Sensitive to light and sound, and prone to headaches and weeping, she is ushered into Dr. Givings’s parlor by a concerned husband (Thomas Jay Ryan) who is relieved to hear a brisk diagnosis and assurances that after a few sessions of therapy his wife will be restored to full health.

I'd love to see this play — and since Charlotte art folks are always bringing Broadway to the Queen City, I wonder when we can see this on stage at the Blumenthal?

Probably never.

Actually not a chance in hell that we'll see this in Charlotte.

Remember 1996?

But I'm sure it's interesting to see, even it the New York Daily News says it's a buzz kill.

Ever wanted to star in your own romance novel?

Probably not because this is the sex tape generation.

Still, if you're one of those old school people who reads to your lover in bed, then Your Tango has the perfect gift suggestion.

The personalized romance novel trend is gaining ground, and if you're looking for an unconventional (and financially feasible) stocking stuffer, this might the perfect treat.

The personalized romance novel is something Carrie Prejean should've tried instead of making her solo sex tape(s).

Maybe if Pam and Tommy Lee had -- nevermind, you have to be able to read in order for this to work.

But what happens if your book falls into the hands of your reading friends? Do you even put this book on the shelf or do you leave it on the bed side?

And what happens when your relationship ends? Do you toss out the close to $50 book, bash your former lover over the head with it or read it and weep? I have a writer friend who said any time she tried to incorporate her current lover into her writing, the relationship ends and then editing a book about the person she used to love and fuck is hard.

But one good thing about a personalized romance novel is that if it ends up in the average person's hands, your secret and passionate love life will be safe from prying eyes.

Have you ever heard of the term "sports widow?"

Maybe you're one of them. On Saturdays, Sundays and Mondays your man or woman is more worried about first downs and touchdowns than getting down.

Some people say, join in the fun and watch the game with him or her. But if you're not a fan of football or your mate is a Carolina Panthers' fan you probably end your weekend very disappointed and possibly horny.

You have to bring the sexy back, emphasis on the SEX. If your mate doesn't watch football with a lot of friends, then you should cuddle up next to your fan in one of his jerseys, a garter belt and black stockings. Points for back seams and heels.

While the game is going on, don't mess with him if he's a serious fan. But during the commercials slip your hand around his cock and stroke him until he's ready for more.

If his team is losing, you might get some during and after the commercial.

But halftime is your time to shine. It will be a quickie — halftime is about 15 minutes.

You don't have to be a sports widow. You can be a sports seductress.

Do not do any of the above during the playoffs, the Super Bowl or any college bowl games.

New York Times best selling author Omar Tyree will make his foray into erotic this fall with the release of Dirty Old Men and other stories.

But don’t expect Tyree to become a full time erotic author, he just wanted to write about older men and younger women since he’s 40 now.

“I’m not in the erotica thing; I just had one subject I wanted to deal with. If you look at the Steve “Air” McNair thing, dying at the hands of a 20-year-old [in July] that’s always going to be an issue. I’m not going to be making up erotica books for entertainment. This was something I needed to say,” Tyree told Creative Loafing in a phone interview about the book.

Dirty Old Men and Other Stories is scheduled for release next month and is presented by Zane, who can seriously be called the Queen of Erotica. Tyree knew this and that’s why he linked up with the publishing maven to release his book.

“I’m not an erotica writer, that’s not my style. I had small pieces that I wanted to get out and Zane is an erotica writer, that’s what she does and that why I put it out with her imprint because she has that audience for it.”

So, how will the Zane faithful take to Tyree’s flirtation with erotica?

The stories are sexy, but if you’re looking strictly for sex on top of sex, you got the wrong book. “Dirty” actually takes readers into to the minds of older men and why they’re drawn to young women.

Tyree said, that’s really the point of the book.

“I know it’s a lot of different reasons why men get involved with women who are considerably younger than them. You have guys all over the world getting involved with young women,” he said.

Initially, Tyree wanted to write magazine articles about men, but he couldn’t find anywhere to place them. “Nobody does short stories in magazines like they used to. So, I needed a vehicle to put out masculine short stories,” he said. To make these stories marketable, Tyree said he had to turn up the sex.

“My experience in the publishing world has been if you’re writing about men, you’d better make it sexual or nobody cares,” he said.

With 14 stories exploring what makes old men dirty, Tyree might not make you care, but this collection is sure to start tongues wagging.

You've seen the commercials for that blanket with sleeves, known as the Snuggie. Now it comes in "sexy" prints like zebra and leopard.

They say you can do anything in a Snuggie. So, does that mean you can have hot, steamy, passionate sex while wrapped up in the fleece blanket?

If you follow the Snuggie Sutra, you can have something.

These funny little drawings show how you can turn the blanket that you can watch T.V. in and still be warm into your latest sex accessory.

I like the

She wears the Snuggie on her ba(ck). He holds the other end in his teeth. You are super if you can hold yourself up and keep him quiet at the same time.

This site is funny, but am I willing to drop $19.95 on a Snuggie? Not when I saw a remote controlled bullet for about that price.

But there is a great use for a Snuggie. It can hide your public sex.